I would just like every ones opinion on this one...... Those people that pretend to be something they are not..... Like vampires for this particular question.... do you think they are just desperately trying to belong some where.... or is it a more deeply rooted problem.... or a fetish perhaps.... this one troubles me a bit... let me know your views please..
I understand what you mean but some peopl dont fake it they are like that.
for some it is a fetish...for others they may actually have some predatory and parasitic tendencies....there are many things that are unexplained by science, shunned as being unprovable, or simply ignored for the same reasons....
just remember....it was not so very long ago that the idea of a round world would get you tortured and burned for heresy
define 'pretending'....do the people who play RPGs fall into this category?
WoW! I say its more of a deeply rooted problem because they are so desperate to connect with anyone even if they have to go the extreme measures of lying or trying to be something they are not.~NFA
no.... rpg certainly does not fall in that category..... i respect rpg and all it encompasses
Everyone is different... I think everyone has their own certain reasons for what they do. Certaintly everyone has done something that they knew was not like them, Though I try to follow the beat of my own drum.
true.....but im meaning the people who have no drum and try way too desperately to fit in.... but i see what you mean as well
ALL THE PEOPLE use their own masks. The mask variates though....the most ridiculous, in my opinion, is that of victim.
I have to say I think Daermon's response summed it up pretty well.
- D
I think that some people want to be something so badly that they convince themselves that they are. They may not even be aware that we might see right through them & know that what they are saying is not true.
I think I will go with "desperately trying to belong" to something or anything...Hive mentality and all...same reason that there are cliques in schools and gangs on the street
perhaps so...... they couldnt fit in there either.... i just wonder what drives someone to want to fit in so bad when my self im happy being my own individual... but i do understand that everyone isnt like me......
Pretendors are of anything.Mostly done to fit in.
But there can be real ones as well whetear they are fetishists or feeders.
I don't know about everyone else when I see guys trying to be Vamp I tend to snigger when I see an woman in her deadly vamp gear I tend to think its realy hot
In my opinion, I would say that only about 1/3, maybe even less, are the real deal. All others fall into the other categories.....RPGers, enthusiasts, fetishists....and the ever so annoying dumbasses who claim to be immortal and 100-500 years old.
Come, Come, we all know there is no such things as Vampires anyone who believes otherwise should have their medication changed, right
I believe "real" is all relative to the person making the judgement. For example, if I walked around biting people for the blood and killing them, I could be considered a real vampire covering most of the mythic stuff. Yet on the other hand I could drink blood of other people and still in another definitional sense be a vampire. So whether it is fetish or not, mental illness, or hobby it could be quite real for the person who is doing such a thing. I myself have a vamp rpg forum and in no way believ I am a vampire, but on the other hand I have many who come through and tend to mix and mingle r/l with online stuff. Some get really into it and mentally have crossover issues.
i think it is just another way to fit in. look at the emo craze. so many people try desperately to find a place for themselves. it's a basic psychological need to have a sense of identity, and a lot of people look to others to decide who they are instead of figuring it out for themselves. however, i really do believe that there are some who are vampires by nature. i admire those people because they can stand up and say, hey, this is who i am, and nothing you can do can change that. but as a fun side note... what's kinda hot is that daermon's comments *always* seem to sum it up.
very well put bad kitty...... i believe it all comes down to the human psyche......which can be a funny thing.... i just pitty the people who try so hard and yet they still look like a fool...... another question then.... should we embrace those "outsiders" or just let them be?
too many people are looking to fit in.they need to learn to be themselves!
pretenders....are in my opinion people trying to outlive a past possibly filled with horrid memories...some chose to act...others choose to become...what it is in question..and who they are...is almost every time impossible to know..for they act so much in hopes of fitting in...they possibly overact....they may be trying to tell you they are not fakers...or maybe they are..you never really know...that is why you must get to know some one before judging them...i have been judged as one of those people and it took me forever to prove myself...many others have this problem...i figure talk...talk and talking more..is the only way to truly know who someone really is and if at all they are real...you know?
haha, thanks dark queen... i was a psych major for a while.
What I remember if I am still correct is most of the gothic people and things of its nature stared out basecally with people that didnt feel they belonged anywhere. Thats about as much as I remember. Then I might say, sure, it could probably be that they are just desperate to feel wanted. The rest of them just got use to it and made or created their own society.
anytime bad kitty...... and i do believe that we should get to know them first..... thats not what i was getting at though.... im speaking about the ones who you know are just out and out lying just to fit in.... what do you do with them...do you humor them or just ignore it?
I guess neither I would ignore them but I wouldn't take them at first sight, in fact I would make them work a little for something.If they want to fit in any place they must work their way a bit in.Wierd idea I just came up with :P
oooh i see. i certainly wouldn't humor them. it just encourages the behavior. here's another wonderful parallel that i saw a lot when i was in high school. i've had a serious problem with self-injury for years and years now that i'm just getting over (horray!!). friends of mine would superficially harm themselves and show off their wounds just to get my approval. the vampirism thing is in the same vein. when this happened to me, i immediately sat the person down and had a talk with them. i would do the same for vampire wannabe's. i feel that that while it's a kind of *flattery* it's also really degrading.
I don't say I am "vampyre" I'm not the real deal, it will only be misleading and I know many would feel like they were decieved. RPG, however is where I make the exception...I roleplay in another forum and that is about as close as it gets.
Well, I personally think that people who pretend to be vampires are (1) dilisional, (2) Attention hungery bastards, or (3) using it as a way to impress others. Those are the people that we real vampire should feed off of.
EXACTLY! thank you kitty... and every one else for the views.....we should neither embrace or ignore them.....they will prove themselves in due time if they are what they say they are.... their "true colors" will show
To tell you the truth, I have been thinking about this for a long time as well..See because if it is that they pretend that they are vamp and it is just to want to belong, why do they not ask to belong instead of camoflauging? But what if they are just trying to gain information from real vamps to understand what they didn't..There are very many questions and so little answers...So when indeed you do find out please, message me...
Because they do not know what they want in life and may be scared and maybe they are just trying to get information from other vamps so they will knkow if they want to become or not...
Because they're afraid to be just human.
You see, if you have a big problem, or a big issue, like "damn, I'm a vampire, what am I gonna do?!", the little problems, like the Algebra test, the being teased at school, and other annoying "ordinary day" things, like having to walk the dog, become small and unimportant compared with the illusion that being a vampire makes you more attractive, you get super-powers, etc.
BadKitty said it best, but I think that living in an imaginary world can be a lot more comforting then have to deal with the petty things of life. It's a fact, for many people.
It's a combo of fetish, and need to belong.
If you are pretending to be something that you are not, there is a reason. Ignoring personal fantasies, I think that people claim they are whenthey are not to fit in. I think people are trying to reach a place where the are comfortable and feel accepted.
i think its a conbination of all of those reasons..people want to feel they belong somewhere and sometimes they truly are interested in it...just because they wonder why someone would do it or why someone would be so interested in it..
sometimes its cuz they associate the fettish with blood to being vampyric when they dont really understand what it means to be a vampyre
Well said Tears another reason is because the fact to believe they're a vampire makes them invulnerable,cool and superior.Since vampires are associated with evil as well,they like it more cause nowadays to be evil is the coolest trend.
Most people are followers, to some degree or another. They want to be apart of some greater whole, regardless of what it is, and will easily slip into the role of 'pretender' to make that happen. As has been stated, most pretenders are in search of a sense of belonging. There will always be many of this sort and that will never change.
Me personally if i felt the need to belong i would have beceome a cheerleader LOL. If someone feels they need to fit in so badly they assume a certain idenity so be it who am I to judge that.. I am happy in my own skin and would hope others are able to be with themselves as well..
*looks up, and falls down laughing*
cheerleader?! That's a good one.
That's right Deathnitegrl. Unfortunatly, you are so right.
People think that by being evil, they're being cool, but being evil has nothing to do with being cool: to me, it has more to do with insecurity - If I attack first, all those two legged creatures will leave me alone...I'm scared of the two legged people...- something among those lines.
But, in some people evil just comes naturally....and then turns against them, but that's another thread...
The desire to belong is indeed ingrained into everyone through their youth and into adulthood. I think that there are those who have 'parasitic' tendancies but they will reveal if they are such in the long run. To think that all who are new and or who have an interest are pretenders would be folly. Given enough rope, they will hang themselves if they are such...
Exactly, I compare wannabes to liars. If they really want to become one they should at least have some knowledge of what they're getting themselves into...otherwise its a waste of time down the road.
As a psychotherapist, I've learned that people adopt all sorts of roles for many and varied reasons. These reasons run the gamut from psychotic delusions, through personal insecurities, to antisocial deceptiveness. Most of the Vampire "wanna-be" types I've met are just having fun, like the kids I grew up with in the 70's who said they were "songwriters-musicians" just because they were in a neighborhood garage band. There was a degree of self-deception going on. Young personalities need to "try on" various roles because they lack sufficient confidence in their own individuality. But a lot of fun was had. My own personal theory is that the vampire role is adopted to enhance sexual excitement. Vampiric types have become a turn-on to many people since the vampire image became sexualized by Bela Lugosi in the 30's. Prior to Lugosi, the folklore vampire was a foul-smelling rotting corpse--not someone you'd want to hop in the sack with! But the image of vampires underwent a major change after Todd Browning's "Dracula," and now vampires are SEXY!!! When I watch "Bram Stoker's Dracula," I get turned on by the three vampire brides who attempt to seduce Jonathan Harker, not horrified or repulsed. My girlfriend looks like Morticia Addams/Lilly Munster, two female fiends I always fantasized about. So I think being a vampire is a definite way for people to enhance their sexual allure. One major problem about people who REALLY drink blood: HIV is extremely dangerous, and--regardless of a person's sexy looks--I would be too afraid of HIV to get mixed up with a real blood drinker these days. There's an irony here. Vampires are sexy, but body fluid transfer is not these days.
I have to agree that I think for older people it is the sex appeal of the vampire image. For kids it has to do with finding where you fit in.
ON a personal level, I've always had a ;feeling,' which ties me to the lifestyle in some mannerisms. Being Wiccan (by birth and beign adopted and at first not knowing, it was truly choice), it was something I clung to as a part of what made me, me.
maybe i am guilty, i like to play around with "being a vampire" but i make it very clear i am not ACTUALLY a vampire... i think vampires are very sexy and intelligent and i think it is okay to admire them, but some do get out of hand with "pretending"... everyone needs somewhere to belong i guess...
well i play rpg's and i dont PRETEND to be them but i do have problem with people using "games" as an example for pretenders and fetish problems. if thats the case then go to a d*mn store and get that taken care of there are also some sites that help with the fetish problem........ and this is all a joke to some
Agreed. and though i play many video games, i dont allow myself to get caught up in a false reality, because it offers me no solice. For some, the pretense of being gothic or vampire-esque is all they have for comfort, and the others... well they are lost.
well now as you have all seen is that people just have that need to be in a group of some sort. for example the U.S. 13 original clonies what is the definition of a colony that is agroup or a mass of people living in the same area.(well thats not the real definition but it is a generalization) but what is wrong with that all of us need to be in a larger group. what do you think you were doing when you joind the site.so make up your mind
Killer and azy, would you say thatVR is diferent than games? would you say that games should not be followd as reality and VR should be considered as part of ones life and/or lifestyle? this is just a question trying to to see it from the other side of your viewpoint.For some as you say might be like that or rather the way you explain them.
No, there is a difference between games and reality, and being able to see that makes us human. In terms of vr, it has game-like properties, such as the level up system and the whole profile deal, but it is simply just a venue for people to come together, and in that respect, look at it. It is enormous!! It is such a large online community, and that's the real difference between vr and video games, but sadly, it is NOT reality.
anti social personality disorders could describe it...... even the sense of wanting to belong...... but why not just ask? why pretend?...no perhaps this is not reality (here)..... but for some of us its pretty close......very close actually. really i think it boils down to the fact that they need help..... get a grip faker.... :)
i agree a lot with dermon. however i think that those who really are vampires are few while those pretending to be one are in the majority
well badkitty....I think you have me blushing....
I simply try to look at most qestions from the third party impartial perspective.....
instead of saying an issue is black or white..I try to see it from multiple sides....and therefore not blind myself to the possible options that might be hidden...
so yes...some are posers..to use the term lightly....some might have actual medically induced symptoms....and some are fetishists.....to me this does not make them a vampire or not..what makes them one is their own belief in the possibility of what they are....