An old friend asked me to record "Base" so that he could hear the cadence. I have a voice that is often helpful to me in recording, but not this time. After a dozen frustrating attempts, Irony gave me some advice...here is the result:
That turned out so well:) It is a stunning poem and your reading just emphasises that:)
This literally exudes power, fear, and exhaustion. I would say I love it, but after a bit of thought, 'love' isn't the right word; In this I hear you in a position I never want to imagine you in, and that echoes in the soul. It is the most powerful thing I have heard come from you, and amazingly emotive. :)
I find no words to describe.Once again,I am left speechless.
Well, that worked.... in a very big way.
I enjoyed that x
Reading the poem you do not understand just how wonderful it is. When I hear your voice reading/emotions in the words... it's stunning. :)
That was awesome. Truly awesome.
And I'll refrain from the dissertation on how many of our most primal emotions elicit the same physical responses, even if the emotions themselves are very dissimilar...
Holy shit... I am nearly in tears, you have captured so much there. My breath actually caught in my throat.
It's hard to find ways to compliment your writing without repeating myself these days; an act I abhor. I love this, though. As always, I am very glad to know you and proud to be privileged enough to read your work.
This is amazing, it created imagery of fear, and the unknown.
I definitely felt this part:
"I am impotence charged with electric fear.
But there is no concept that I will escape."
wonderful as always!
A careful graduation of effects that is common only at the masters of sensibility and knowledge!
I don`t know wht to do: to be happy pr o be compassionate or to cry!
But suddenly I understand.I could be both the darkness and the fear....
so i am frightened and
... I`m beginning to see...
Impressive. a very different feeling than most of what you write.
But as always, conveyed in metaphorical perfection.
Your writing is always an experience for me and I find that anything I can say to describe that experience is eclipsed by the words you used to create it, so just let me say that it is amazing.
This is staying on my desktop to be listened to often. I love hearing you read your work:)
Hearing you read your work... the inflection and rhythm... to hear it as you hear it in your head... especially such an empassioned poem.
I so never read it the same way you meant it to be heard. You improve on perfection.
Your writing and oratory never fail to impress.
I will re-visit this one often.
I love hearing you read, so very, very much.
I thinc i r alerjik 2 stewpud, evri tym i entar irc i gets da snifflz. :(
I don't have a cool comment for this... other then I love to hear you read your work. And to hear you cuss. :) We want more, please.
I adore the cadence in your reading.
And, 'yes' I agree with Vampirerwitch: I liked hearing you 'cuss'.
The best I can say is that it's entrancing. I'm so glad that I was finally able to listen to it.
This one conveys so much emotion and strength. I think it is perhaps one of my favourites:) I keep getting drawn back to the line "Fuck your crisper drawer." It is almost like a written slap to the face, a call to pay attention.
I am not sure exactly what I think of this one. It is powerful, certainly. It is exceptionally well written, as are all your works. It challenges me to understand the emotion it conveys, and I am not certain that I can identify with the feeling you have imbued it with. I feel the failing is with my own emotional response though, my all or nothing/never or forever approach to friendships and love, which leaves temporary dalliances as a foreign concept.
Yay the crisper drawer did it for me...great stuff.
Just an attempt at a carpe diem of my very own.
And a question for you: Even if you don't agree with a piece of writing...can it still have merit? If only just in the emotion? Can my dalliance still be powerful when read even as you reject it as a personal construct for yourself?
Of course it can, and is! As I said, it challenges me, I've *thought* about this one a lot more to figure out exactly how it is it makes me feel. That alone makes it a worthy piece of art. The fact that I don't identify with it is not a reflection of your work, but more a facet of myself that I had not truly thought about before reading this.
I didn't mean to suggest that I felt criticized. I ask to invite discourse on something that interests me. A comment I get frequently, and my most hated comment is: "I don't get it."
I guess I don't see myself as a cryptic writer. I write for few reasons...to paint pictures in your head and to make you have an emotional response to words used sparingly and focused sharply.
Do I sometimes have a meaning below the meaning? Yes. But reading it at the surface level should always paint a picture and/or give you a feeling if I've done my job. Yours will differ from the next reader because I want you to provide at least half of the experience. That you have makes me happy, even in cases where a piece isn't liked so much or is disliked outright.
It paints a picture for me, the surface meaning is clear and precise. It is the emotional response below that that gave me pause and forced me to think.
("that that". God damnit, English. Why must we be this way?)
Any and all thoughts on the subject welcome.
Well done as always. :)
It brings to me a range of emotion. An ebb and flow with a well place crescendo. What I hear is, "Look at me, the me of now. Don't look beyond or behind. Be with me in THIS moment."
I am addicted and inspired by your work. Thank you for sharing.
You always write beautifully, I am biased towards your style but I will try to stay a little objective.
I would agree with Ockham pertaining to merit. I believe it works for most things, when you have respect for someones ideals irrespective if you agree or not on the subject it will always have merit.
As for it being powerful, if people don't agree they will just call you a power hungry nut, so 'yes' it's still powerful.
And my little'ol comment will be lost at the bottom of the chain...
...but I'm glad I could inspire you a bit for this. How often is it one word that strikes our fancy and helps to give birth to art. Something as wonderful as your creation.
I fear to assume, but in this case, I think... I get it.
words escape even the most cunning of us.
..desire, frustration & lust, were 'conveyed' to me.
Yet, to join the debate, I so love your writing, even if I don't always get your picture.
A great one!
Damn I forgot to close the water and my gbath is a mess now!
I guess this poem influenced my neighbours too...
I love the end!
I do believe this is one of my very favorites.
I love this, it perfectly captures the subject:) Thank you for sharing your poetry, I don't think I say that enough.
I wish I had an ounce of what inspires you.
Hey Lifeblood ... even a fraction of that.
Personality fracture complete
Another great one!!??
Hey, post a damn bad poem too, or I`ll think you are torturing Baudelaire that came back from the dead!
You never fail to blow me completely away. This one tightened my gut, stopped my breathing and put me on the edge of my seat like one of the few good horror movies.
Such a gorgeous ache in the reading.
You'll never know how appreciated that was. I have been struggling with whether or not this one sucked. Thank you for your always welcome comment, critique, and encouragement.
The gut tightening breath stealing feeling this poem gave me has already been said so eloquently by beastt. I think this is probably the most powerful poem I have ever seen you write. I feel this mans pain and grief intimately. Your words punch those emotions right through my chest and into my heart. Don't you dare for one moment think that this poem sucks. It knocks me off my feet. It is wonderful!
I do believe I have run out of positive descriptors and unique good things to say about your art.
This one... is special. It took me a couple times through to get the feel for it, and I'm sure in your heart, and how you hear it in your mind, you feel it in a different way than I do.
The thing I love most about this is, it is a bit to the left of your usual writing. You're not afraid to take risks, to try something new, to go somewhere you haven't gone before.
That is such a refreshing quality, and one I rarely find in the people I meet.
This isn't just another wonderfuly written poem - this is another piece of you that you have shared with all of us.
She (you, Joli), has range for certain. Were I ever able to approach her ability with words, I know I'd cower in one safe corner, afraid to move from an area of comfort. Joli, you stretch and we gasp. You shift footing and we hold our breath. You tilt your head 93° to the horizon and you leave us almost too stunned to speak.
They're words: just words. And you wield them like a Samurai, cutting the candle's flame or carving a gaping wound, to watch our hearts fall from our chest.
I'm just going to point you at this the next time you are worried that you've written something that sucks. You have never written anything that I have not thoroughly enjoyed, and while self-criticism is what grinds the edge of talent, your talent is already sharp enough to slice the soul. Any sharper, and I might bleed out just from reading.
I'm speechless. No writer ever had such encouragement. Thank you for taking your valuable time to let me know that you like my work.
I'd like to point out that that looked a lot like speech to me, young lady.
Luv u newayz, bb. ;)
Got me! :)
So tell me, when do you plan to publish a book so that I can buy it? ;)
I am always awed and silenced when I leave your journal Joli.Simply amazing.
I love these words:) Remind me to ask you what banana cream pie is sometime. It sounds wonderful:)
As your last two entries here have shown again, you are a master with the English language. I could only hope to one day be half as good as you at creating images with my words.
Some days, I wish I had a window into your mind just to try and understand how you do it...
you did it again
It is truly wonderful to hear your voice have the same meaning to myself.
What I love about this, and what to me makes this an original perspective of a very human condition/inspiration for poetry are these two sections:
And I shoplift time,
I crave your words
Like banana cream pie
On a summer day.
You're good, Joli. Really, really good. This is gorgeous, inspiring writing, as is all of your writing that I've been lucky enough to read.
Now the question is, when are you going to publish a chapbook of your poetry and or short stories? That is, of course, if you haven't already. Of course, if you have, then how do I find it?
when the day
Hey however I `d like to read them, your poems just ... blanket me!
I'm reading that to a glass of red wine ... it so works.
My five days down south will never be enough to grasp the magic that must fill your world. I yearn to know these words, their meanings and taste, but my five days could never be enough.
It's like trying to catch the feel of feathers as they take to the sky when all you have are hands.
I can see it all so clearly now..and the smell of fresh,cleansing rain.
OK, I have to say I love the name "Cistern Girl".
wow, it has been a long time since something rendered me speechless for 5 minutes
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