I get more than enough sleep at night, but I never feel like I do. I tend to always wake up with a headache and more tired than one should be after eight hours.
So, Aphrodite is alright. She's perfectly healthy for a cat her age. They think it's probably a food allergy that is causing her to vomit like she does. So we had to get her some special food to try for two months and see if that solves the issue. If not we'll have to have her X-Rayed to see if they can't find another issue. They did blood work on her and her organs are in perfect working order. That's what I was really worried about. It being her kidneys or something more serious. After losing Calle due to kidney disease I get a bit paranoid about it. Hopefully the food solves all the problems.
I have to take Aphrodite to the vet in a few. She's been throwing up a lot, and it's just got me really worried about her. She seems perfectly healthy otherwise, but still, I'm paranoid about it. I just don't know what's wrong. We've changed her food, thinking it was that, trying every brand we could get, and it hasn't helped. I don't know if it's just old age or if it's something more serious. Or if it's nothing at all and she just want's to be bulimic. I just don't know. So, hopefully the vet can fill me in. I don't want to lose her as well, on top of everything else I've lost recently.
I finished watching Hemlock Grove tonight. It was... Interesting. What I find really funny though, is Bill Skarsgård, who plays one of the main characters, Roman Godfrey, is the brother of Alexander Skarsgård, who as most will know plays Eric Northman on True Blood, played a vampire. And throughout the whole series I kept thinking how much Bill looked like his older brother. It became super apparent in the last, oh I would say fifteen or so minutes of the last episode. Especially when he went vampire. It was like watching a younger Alexander.
But yeah. I am a little mixed as far as the series goes. It was alright, though the plot was slow and the acting was mediocre. The last two episodes pissed me off as well. I mean, really, what the fuck? It was good, but not great. But as far as a horror/supernatural/mystery goes, it wasn't god awful. I mean I liked it more than Supernatural or the Vampire Diaries. Not quite up there with True Blood, even though I am not a fan of True Blood. But, I did like the way they did the shift from human to wolf. Even if I did hate the name Peter for a werewolf character.
Bed! How I have missed you. Time for an episode of Hemlock Grove than I am out for tthe night. I don't even know if I will make it through an entire episode. It's been an exhausting day, both physically and mentally.
It's been a long day. I'm tired and have a headache but I don't think that we'll be heading back home any time soon. We're here at my grandmother's house, and have been since around four thirty this afternoon. The mass was a typical Catholic funeral mass, full of standing ups and sitting downs and a ton of songs and prayers. And the actual internment was lovely. Short and simple, since he wasn't buried, he was cremated. We got to visit my great grandparents at their grave, and my great uncle Arthur, who is right next to them. It was a sad day and I am glad to be done with it. Now all I want to do is go home, curl up in bed, watch an episode or two of Hemlock Grove then go to sleep. I have been up since five and I am all but dead now.
God willing, this will be the last funeral I have to attend for family for a very long time.
I just wanted to wish MrD a very happy birthday.
Even though he probably won't see this...
Against my better judgment I find myself thinking of you quite often. I wonder how you are, what you're doing. I wonder if you ever miss me like I miss you. Love is a funny thing. And it is love... Because regardless of what our past may be, I do care for you still. I do love you. That was never a lie.
I have to admit, last nght was really rough for me. Friday is probably going to be ten times worse.
You are an idiot who doesn't know how to properly spell simple words. It gets me every time I see something written by you.
In other news, why did I not know Charlaine Harris wrote two new Sookie Stackhouse novels? I hit the library yesterday and was surprised to see them on the shelf. They aren't the most astounding reads, but I enjoy them for what they are. Quick little feel good books with some drama and suspense. I already finished the first one, now it's off to read the second. It keeps my mind off what's waiting for me this coming week. The Rosary and the funeral.
Are you talking about Dead Reckoning and Deadlocked?
They are both really good. The last book in the series, Dead Ever After, will be out next month.
I'm totally addicted to the series. I have all of them so far.
Yeah. The last one I had bought and read was Dead in the Family. Aside from these most recent two, I own all the rest. I really enjoy the series. I am going to have to get Dead Reckoning and Deadlocked the next time I visit Barnes and Noble.
And the last book is coming out next month? It is going to be a shame to see it end. I want her to end up with Bill and be happy. But the way it went, if Harris doesn't kill her, she's probably likely to end up with Sam. Since Eric is now out of the picture after the whole cluviel dor incident.
My brother and sister-in-law headed out to Vegas today. Which means I am in charge of their two little dwarf bunnies until they get back. I just want to throw this out there but I hate rabbits. Loath them. I have since was a kid and my cousin Chris' monster rabbit bit and clawed the ever loving fuck out of my arm. They are soft, adorable little lies. Anyway, I had to go switch them out. They have two females and ever since they were fixed they fight when left together. So Kevin and Liz keep them separate. One is always kept in the little cage inside their enclosure. So, I had to go swap them out and I go to pick up whichever one is outside the cage to put her into it, and the little bitch claws my arm. Freaking tore out a pretty good chunck of skin. Yeah. I am not a happy camper right now. I got the job done, thankfully the other rabbit is not half as bad as the first one was and she let me pick her up with little issue. But yeah, never again. Those little fuckers are on their own.
Looking up relaxation videos on youtube and I stumbled onto the "weird" part of the ASMR/relaxation community. I spent the last half hour watching a man in a green suit caress a cardboard box and play with a playstation controller and a rubix cube... Sometimes I just don't even know.
I think I am going to go back to watching Iris. It seems like the safer choice here.
Kpop, Kdramas, and the thought that one day I will be living in Seoul. These are the only things that keep me going anymore.
I am not going to be around much outside of brief visits via my phone for a while. I just have no desire to sit in front of the computer right now. There are so many things outside of and away from the internet that need my attention right now. You can still reach me, I will log into my four accounts daily. I just won't be here for very long when I do. Those who have my number, feel free to call or text. Those who have me on Facebook, the same goes. I probably won't be on much. So... Yeah.
So my father informed me of when the services are going to be held. We're having the Rosary on Tuesday night, and the funeral on Friday morning. Next week is just going to absolutely suck. I am not looking forward to doing this all over again.
Well, that was easy. I am going to miss the names, Prometheus and Dream, but the accounts went to good people, so it's all good.
So, I have two alts I don't log into much these days. Dream, and Prometheus. So, yeah... Anyone want one, or both?
With Dream, as it is in Hell, I think Saetan will be willing to trade it out to the Society of your choice, as it was only brought in on a volunteer basis, and not as a shit starter. And, as the accounts are free you will have to purchase a PM for them, or make sure that keeping them free won't be a breach of TOS on your part.
If interested shoot me a message. I just can't handle six accounts, and while I hate to give up the names, it is for the best.
I've just been so tired these last few days. On top of that I've had a pretty constant headache. I don' know what the hell is wrong with me anymore. I don't know if I should go see a doctor or if it's just stress from everything. I've just been running on autopilot.
We should find out about the funeral and such tomorrow. My dad is going to go with my grandmother to figure out when we can hold the service and what we're going to do. Everything just sucks right now. Technically Ralph wasn't my grandfather, we weren't related by blood. He married my grandmother when my dad was around thirteen. I don't know my real grandfather. He ditched my family when my dad was little, and we don't talk about him. He went off to Mississippi, started another family, and wound up bailing on them, too. So I might have more half relations than those I actually know about. But, Ralph has always been there in my life. But, he was never anything but "Ralph" to me. But lately I regret not really considering him more. He was there for my grandmother when my real "grandfather" wasn't. And yet, I consider the man I've never meet my family, and Ralph was always that outsider. I've been pretty fucked up in the way I've perceived the situation. The first time I ever called him my grandfather was at the hospital on Saturday night, and he wasn't even there to hear it.
I don't know. I feel like shit right now. I'm only here because I don't want to go back to sleep. It's all I've been doing lately.
If you are tired and having headaches then it is more likely to be stress than anything else. I have been there as well. The best thing for the stress headaches is herbal tea - usually chamomile or black tea. Sometimes green tea works wonders as well. I hope you feel better real soon, although I know the cause for your stress. I am sorry it happened, and can't say anything at all to comfort you, but you have my number if you need it for any reason at any time. Love ya, Immy.
Here as always, should you need me, dearest. *Hugs*
Today has just been a whole lot of suck. I didn't sleep well, or for very long. The only somewhat nice thing was me and my mother going to Ulta to get her hair done, then having lunch at the awesome sushi place. I have been pretty out of it, tired and dealing with a major headache. I just want to curl up in bed and sleep for days.
My family has been dealt more death is the past three years than any one family should face. And three of those deaths were in the last twelve months alone. Honestly, I don't know how much more any of us can take.
Trust that I am not posting this to 'compete'- but when my dad died in 1992, so did 2 of my uncles and my cousin and two grandparents all within a 3 month span. Six people in 3 months. Since then, the rest of my Dad's family's generation has been plucked off at a stead pace as well as my sister and grandmother being murdered in 1996. It used to be overwhelming, until I had no other choice but to accept I was not alone in losing people, even by the numbers in a short span. All I could do is be thankful I had them in the first place- in a world where some people have no one, ever.
*steady* pace... I meant.
And my point being, I know the feeling- and there just isn't anything any can say or do to make it better. In some cases time doesn't even heal- you just make room for more feelings, sad, angry, and happy ones.
We left the hospital at three last night, got home at four. I went right to bed. Just woke up and my mom told me he passed away at eight this morning. God is one mean son of a bitch.
I'm sorry for your loss Nicole. ~Hugs~
Immy, I am so sorry hun. I wish I could do more than offer a few worthless condolences and make you feel better, but I can't. All I can say is I am here if you need me and I will inbox you my number if you want to call me - no matter if it is day or night. Love ya girl, you take care of you and don't worry about VR, but know I am here for you when you need me.
I'm sorry sugar. If you need a shoulder, just holler.
I got to see him for the first time all night. It was during his Last Rites. Yeah...
Still at the hospital... There's no real change. He had some seizures and is still unconscious and unresponsive. I don't think we'll be leaving anytime soon.
The updates my aunt keeps giving us just get worse and worse. He's basically on life support at this point. I don't think there is any hope now.
They don't think he's going to make it. So soon after uncle Del... This isn't fair. It really isn't fair.
We're headed down to the hospital now. USC hospital is just so damn far away. And a drive into downtown L.A. on a Saturday evening is going to be hell. Probably won't be around for a while.
My aunt Betty just called. My grandfather had a stroke. He's in the hospital in critical condition.
I swear to god, my family can't catch a break. Great grandma, Robert, Del, and now Ralph... Seriously life, can't you go pick off the members of someone else's family?
Got rid of my Mentorship on this account. I only ever used it for storage anyway. Instead, I created Inferno and set that up with Vergil. I'm unsure about the banner, I was mostly just testing out a new kind of thing to give me the fire look over the text. I think the idea still needs some tweaking.
Went to sleep with a headache. Woke up with a headache. Had a shitty dream involving Nick. Yup, today is going to suck, I can already tell.
Oh, yeah, I updated my profile. And by "updated" I mean I removed everything save for my playlist and a happy little gif. Only one in thirty people ever read it, anyway. So, meh. Done.
I also removed my portfolio. For reason I don't really know.
I've missed being able to talk to you like this, D. You always manage to make me smile and laugh so easily. I love the things I learn about you as time goes on.
Another night with no sleep because of a Kdrama. Sleep, I once knew you so well. Now you are but a distant acquaintance I meet every once in a while to catch up. Wae? Why are Kdramas so unbelievably addicting? God, when I finally move to South Korea I will never leave my house because I will just be watching Kdramas ALL THE TIME. It is impossible to stop at one episode. I had all intentions of watching one episode then going to bed. Then the story got so damn good and that one episode turned into the last five episodes.
It's the ravings of a lunatic. Do you pay much attention to a crazy person spouting gibberish on the street? No. Sure, you notice but you don't give it much thought and simply continue on your way. The Internet is no different. If someone wants to ramble on about nonsense any sensible person knows to be untrue, let them. Let them plagiarize whatever they wish to, throw tantrums when they don't get their way. In the end, when everyone stops giving a single fuck, they will shut up. It's not the first time said loon went on such a tirade. I recall an entire profile was dedicated to people who were "conspiring" against them. It's just easier to ignore it, like you would such a person on the street, than it is to try and make them see reason. They don't live in reality, they live in a lovely little place called delusion. Let them be happy with whatever they have concocted in their heads, and just move on. It's pointless to fight them. You won't win.
It was nice, hearing him call me sexy. I am not so foolish as to actually believe it, but it was nice all the same. And it put a smile on my lips.
Happy birthday, D.
Well hey, look what I got:
happy vr birthday, n it's like that, this place is what you make it, I journled several times about us representing the site n making it good or bad.
And I hope I am still around with you. I would miss you if one of us ever left VR. Some friendships would be hard to replace. You are one of them, I count myself lucky to be able to call you my friend and share my Kpop and Kdrama addiction with. What would I do without my Immy?
Congrats! And well said :)
Had a crazy dream. T.O.P. and G-Dragon joined up with U-KISS after Eli and AJ went off to do their own thing. And Sungyeol from Infinite was there, too. Just because, I guess. And I went to like this debut fan meeting thing and it was all in Korean, even though most of them can speak English. I have no idea, I swear. But, it was awsome. And that would be one hell of a group.
I think it's safe to say you've been watching waaay too much K-PoP lately lol
There is no such thing as "too much" Kpop!
No kidding. I been having dreams of T.O.P and G dragon too but not like that, the XXX rated kind... Makes me mad cause I always have to wake up at crucial moments.
You know, having all those accounts does make for some fun honor bombing. All that positive can really make a dent. Just wait until they are all Sires (it should only take like, seven more years), I will have over three hundred points a day. Watch out, VR! Someone has to counterbalance all the stupid that goes around.
Just so no one thinks I'm trying to "hide" and deceive people. My accounts are as follows:
This one, of course, Vergil, Demure, Ephemeral, Dream, and Prometheus.
Vergil is a recent acquisition, given to me by Saetan. The others I've had for a while. And, it's never been a secret as to who I am. On most of my profiles I will tell you somewhere who I am and what profiles are mine. If you don't read, that's really not my problem. No one can ever say I've hidden who I am for any purpose here. There's no reason for me to ever do so. I don't play those stupid games.
Huh, well, that was interesting. Guess I am a two-faced bullshitter who's in 'cahoots' with the wrong people. Meh, can't please everyone. I think Saetan is awesome, and if that earns me a block and nasty names and whatnot, I shall take it.
Well I have to say you're awesum yourself so there:P
Aw, you're awesome, too! Like, super duper awesome with a cherry on top. Because cherries are awesome. And delicious. I don't know where I was going with this...
well i think you are lovely. Good for you for sticking to your guns, So many people on here turn on eachother, to please the other party. Much love Immy xx
Oh it's gotten me a few too. And, not surprisingly I care as much as you do. I just find it funny to know that thy aim hard at Magatsuhi like status means something to me still. I sired 6 times, most of them had a blocked list that had a penalty attached- I can do it again easily if I only tried. They're just a little too spineless to come to this profile, but meh.
Two-face bullshitter? ...Okay, who do I need to arrange an accident for?
Don't let the idiots get to you. You're awesome. Anyone disagrees with that, I'll gladly set them straight. :)
Eh, screw em. You're pretty awesome yourself, and I adore you!
I cleaned out my main email account today. I've had the account since high school so there was so much trash and junk... But, so many memories there as well. I realize, I hurt a lot of people in my life. Reading over some of those old emails from people I had cared so much about. The way I hurt them. It was hard. Sometimes I wish I could go back and do so much over again. Starting with Blake. Blake, Ryan, Laura, Ron... all of them. I'd fix it all so I never hurt them in the end. There was also stuff from people who hurt me just as badly. Ricki most of all. Things from John that I had saved from high school. Stuff from Logan. And, I couldn't bring myself to get rid of most of it. Because, regardless of the pain that came from the words, they're still memories. Still things that tie me to certain people I can't forget.
And there was something from Blake from back in 2004 that was in German and I never paid much attention to. Something about calling him if I ever wanted to "relieve some tension" and the like. I'm pretty sure he was coming on to me, given the way it was worded and what followed those words. And I never took advantage of that. Stupid me.
Don't expect to see me on much under this account. I think I'll be spending most, if not all, of my time over on my newly acquired account. I'll only log on for messages, comments, to hand out honor, and to check up on my Coven. Though I don't even know why I bother with my Coven, nothing ever goes on there. Meh, whatever.
I've got Game of Thrones on the television, since I had yet been able to watch the premiere. And, I'm working on the new profile. I should have it all set up so so I can get to changing the name and such. I am having fun with the new profile.
I hate when I go to sleep only to wake up a few hours later with no chance of getting back to sleep again. But, since I am up I figure I could start working on my new account. As I said in my last journal entry, Saetan is amazing. She gave me a lifetime sire account to play with. Mostly because I suck and don't get on Dream enough because it's a free account. So, I am going to have some fun. Watch out, Hell, Virgil is so coming back! So yeah... I should go figure out what I want the new account to say and how I want it to look.
I really can't thank Saetan enough. Like seriously, she is amazing. Just absolutely one fantastic lady.
Painted my nails. Tried my hand at a gradient effect, it didn't turn out too shabby, if I do say so. The colors I used though were a bit too similar in shade, so next time I have to pick colors that very more. I used Essie's new shade, Maximillian Strasse-her, and OPI's Mermaid's Tears. The OPI color was a little more on the green side, while the Essie color was more on the grey side. It was an interesting combination. I will have to take a picture in natural light so you can see, as it is, my bedroom lamp washes out the color quite a bit. So yeah... I have way too much fun painting my nails sometimes. I want to try my hand at water marbling, the last time I attempted it things got all messed up. But I think I can make it work this time around.
Drifting away, like I tend to do. I have grown tired of many of you I considered friends, so now I am shutting you out. It's nothing personal, things have just run their corse and I am growing bored of you. Truth be told though, many of you pushed me away first. So, I do hope you can take this with the same quiet dignity that I did when you did it to me. I do wonder how long it will actually take some of you to notice my absence. Will you even miss me at all?
I had a dream about you. Again. And it was heartbreaking. But, of course, they always are.
Honestly I don't know how to feel about the situation in Korea. I really don't. Of course, I'm hoping that things settle down and no more people are injured and killed due to North Korea bombing South Korea. I also want North Korea to just cease to be right now.
As I said last month, I finally figured out what I want to do with my life. Teach English in Seoul. However, if things keep up the way they are, I'm unsure if going to South Korea would be a wise decision. The city is only 31 miles from the 38th parallel, which is the border between North and South Korea. And, really, being that close to a country that is intent on war, well, as I said, it wouldn't be a wise decision.
So, now I just don't even know. It's my dream, to live in Seoul. My dream and I want to get there. But really, with the cease fire having been thrown away, God knows what's going to happen now to both countries. I'm so conflicted about everything. I'm still keeping on track, of course. And if things keep going down the path they're going, I won't have to learn Korean on my own, as I'm sure the Air Force will be more than happy to teach me and station me over there if I want it.
I suppose I can say that it's just my luck. I finally figure out what to do with myself and then this happens. But then again, North Korea has always been a ticking time bomb.
Try not to worry. The only thing North Korea will accomplish is getting completely fucked over. It would be suicide for them to offload a nuke, but that leader is nuts. I'm usually against occupations of other countries... but that's the only possible outcome I can see that would have the least collateral damage.
Ive been to Seoul. You WILL love it!
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