The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

Yes, I was dating a guy for a year & was deeply in love with him. Then one day he just broke it off & said he wanted to just be friends. It broke my heart & I felt I had nothing to live for. I came home & attempted suicide. All it got me was a week in the crazy ward where they keep you pumped up with meds. We remained friends for 4 years & then he met a rich bitc- & now we don't even talk anymore.

Yes not attempted but thought of it and thought of homicide too.

There's a thin line between love and hate, I agree with that, and I also believe there's a thin line between happiness and despair. Someone who is sensitive and emotional hurts easily and often are the favorite targets for sadists.

yes..
i tried once ,with pills..
i know that it's a stupid thing to do, but only who really knew what really love is can think about that..
because real love have no limits..

I myself had one of my family members, a blood relative, who commited suicide using pills before the age of 40, because she knew her husband was leaving her for someone else. Very sad indeed.

I'm sure we have all felt like that at one point in time or another. But there is more to life and new loves to be gained then to end it in tragity.
Sad when those feel compelled in doing so.

My Step-Uncle committed sucide....he stepped out of the closet thinking his family would understand he was gay.

It saddens me that he did commit his own death, because of the ignorance of his family not understanding.

I was 10 at the time and whispers went on in the family.
If only they would of loved him for him and not ridiculed him for being gay.

So for the lack of understanding and he thought they hated him so...he ended his life.

I am pansexual (meaning I don't discriminate who I am attracted to, their gender/identity means nothing to me, I look at the person not their gender) , and I was involved in an over a year long relationship with a female and it was messed up cause I loved her and vice versa but I tried to end it a couple of times cause we fought constantly and she'd threaten suicide to get me to not end it...messed up. Finally I ended it for good.

Yeah,I attempted to rid of myself from this life over 47
times.Anyo normal person would have died..doing what i did.
I decided that maybe..jkust maybe i can't leave this
earth just yet.Maybe hell don't want me and the grim
reaper don't needs me...and heaven hates me.OR
maybe i am dead and THIS is my eternal resting.
I did this cause,
well...My family was very mean and angry..expecially to me..and the animals.Then loves..broke my heart,friends
died..family was gone..everything was cursed and
toren apart.
I think about it still,
but if i tried again..it would just fail.
I even though of killing others and many many things,
but thats just me.I hate it here..cause i am diffrent,
and no one can take it..and my being here.
I hung myself,shot myself,cut myself(deep)..posion
intake,stabbed,burned,payed someone to kill me..
well the list goes on.
I'm here to stay.
I don't know what to do but wait and see what i am
here for..it must be important..or good or evil..
whatever.But,I decided sence life will not let me
take a vaction..or evern be kind to me..even in the
slightest way..whatever im suppost to do..I am
NOT doing..and if im not suppost to do it,I'll do it.
just to dispite the ways of my pain...and no one to
give me a break from it.
I believe..that i have no hiddin demons that make me
do this...this is my nature.
I am strong..but i do have limits.
I whent threw alot...ALOT.
I also had friends that actually killed themselves,
and some attempt.
I try to stop them..and sometimes make them
understand..that what they are going threw in
NOTHING compaired to the depts of what others are
suffering from in this world.
To fight,to live..and to die happy.

I noticed that women are answering. I guess this type of thing isn't as big for men. I think they do most of the leaving.

I was with someone for seven years and engaged. He cheated on me with one of the Mothers whose autistic kid was my client. I sat crying to her about him because I knew her a long time not knowing they were having an affair behind my back. She had started temping where he worked. That broke up and we got back together and then he left again and I found a letter that the first one wrote to him jealous of another woman at work. He married her two weeks or so after he moved out. He said he had never loved me at all over that whole time. He spread rumors about my daughter going berserk and having to call the police and she struck a cop and went to jail...totally untrue. Told people we were still together when we weren't plus I lived next door to his family. It was a whole progression of things and I had a melt down. I attempted suicide and nearly made it. I was in that psychiatric place too for two weeks. It's not fun and they treat you poorly. People get into a place where reason doesn't exist. I am totally not like that at all but it happened anyway. The irony of it all is she died about four years later of a brain tumor. He came back to his Mother's, next door and then moved up above her apartment. He walked by mine everyday but by then...I didn't care, lol. It happens. One of the fathers of a client was a psychologist and told me a break up of many years like that is emotionally the same as a death.

I debated on posting in here but here it goes anyways, when mysaughter died back in 93 and her father died 3 months later, form Cancer I wanted nothing more then to just end it i had no desire what so ever to even want to move on or even get out of bed or eat or anything....so after burying him and deciding i wanted nothing better then to go to sleep and never wake back up again, and taking enough drugs to kill an elephant every felt it was in my best interest to lock me away for a month because i could not function what so ever, took me a long time to heal from such loss of love...

not over a guy. thought about it. but realized that no man is worth that. took a while to get over it though. it wasnt easy.

I've never been that far gone over a lover I'll admit it is insane when oen of ym long long relationships end, especially if I make the decision to end it because I end up doing double and triple takes and changing my mind but even if your deeply in love with someone but know it's not that forever kind of love you have to do it, but I do know people who have been so grief stricken and shocked mainly it seems the shock is what pushes them into wanting to do this to themselves, and I hoenstly sometimes don't completely understand why.

love is the strongest emotion with hate right up there with it,,, love can make you or break you ive seen it ive been in it and i was with a man 18 years he had an affair the last part of those years..

when my kids were 4 and 2 he told me he was moving to our new house without us,,i wnated to die.

i tild him i did and his reply was so die then..

i went to the bathroom with a double edged razor blade and sliced one time .. i didnt really want to die i found that out emmidieatly when i had to close my wrist and hold it on... it was VERY bad and we rushed to the hospital.

a microscopic surgeon sowed my wrist back together and I NEVER even thought about suicide ever again,,,

lifes to precious no matter what happens..what we feel is love will come and go and then if were really strong in believing we will have it someday and it will be right ..bam it happens..least for me it did.

i never lost faith that it would . came close a few times but not.~jj

i can say ive never thought of committing suicide but the murder thing ya honestly i have a month ago i left my ex we were together for 12 yrs he beat me on a regular basis for yrs and broke my jaw last year for trying to leave him hes the reason i CANT have kids and the reason our daughter died several years ago hes done things that cant be mentioned in here BUT rather than go to jail for the rest of my life over someone who is soooo not worth it i walked out on my life took my car and the clothes on my back and jus left i havent looked back called or made any contact with him and his family this was how i dealt with my rage just walked out and away lettin karma deal with the rest and please let me say this if a man ever puts his hands on a woman in hate and rage he does not love you in any way shape or form GET OUT LEAVE because if you are strong enough to survive mentaly and physicaly being brutalised then you are strong enough to make it without him the men who do these things are cowards pure and simple and in the end will be more miserable than they ever made you
JEWLZ

Word to your power Sister Soldier Jewlz!

Ty Dab if it wasnt for friends on here and elsewhere i dont know if i would have had the courage to do it i walked out with my car an the clothes on my back i jave to start completely over but oddly enough im happier now than ive been in years

Yes i have also been in lvoe before and one day when me and her were finally just beginning to fall even deeper her parents decided they didnt like me and they told her to break up with me so she did i cut myself alot because of that i will never get over how much that hurt me it completely destroyed me but me and her now remain good friends and she still loves me but i rly wish me and her were still together i mean suicide came across my mind when we broke up but im just me and her are still freinds i mean i do still love her

Azuredark mentioned that not many men are posting on this thread. Reason may be that they're dead. Last time I checked, more women try to commit suicide, but more men actually accomplish it.

The problem with "love" is that too many people try to "control" the person they say they love. Love is not something to be control, it is something that two individuals share and nuture.

I have never thought about suicide because I would never give anybody that much control. Murder is always an entertaining thought, yet it is just that, a thought.

I've never tried to actually kill myself, I mutilated my self when I was younger with anything I could find.

I don't handle anger well. I let it build up until I can't hold it anymore. My arms would go numb, from lack of showing hurt or anger. Totally, physically numb, I had to cut myself to get the feeling back in them.

Then, I stopped cutting and started piercing.

I've almost overdosed on pills accidentally a few times.

But last year my husband and I went through a seperation, we had our daughter she wasn't even a year old yet.

He wanted the seperation claimed he hated me, always did, I didn't turn him on, said I was a horrible mother, hit me, that was when we were seperated.

I had to live with him. I had no other place to go.

I would contemplate suicide because it hurt SO MUCH, to have someone you love with every fiber of your being slowly begin to destroy you and could give 2 sh-ts less.

Then one night around Halloween he was working at the Bricktown Haunted Warehouse, I put my daughter to bed, and went into the bathroom. I was going to go through with it until my bf/sister Candace (yourXworstXnightmareX) text messaged me.

I told her, I couldn't do it anymore. I couldn't live anymore.

I started to believe everything my husband said, that I was worthless, and a horrible mom,etc,etc.

And I was better off gone, but she talked me out of it.

Now, we're back together, and expecting another daughter. He's ashamed he put through all of that. He still tries to make up for it.

Woman are more emotionally prone, and we hurt more easily.

Plus, men do go through with suicide more times than women.

I recall taking a bunch of pills when I was 17 or 18 years old over some exchange student I was fixated on who was crazy in his own way...fortunately, I ended up sick and dizzy for one day.
I've learned over the years that if the relationship isn't meant to be, it isn't. I take the pain, reget - all of it - think about what went wrong, and get on with my life.

I must admit that I have a revenge thing in me; when my recent ex and I broke up, I was tempted to have a destruction ritual place on him to do him in. But he wasn't worth my time or my Karma.

when my exwife and i split, i seriously contemplated it....now looking back i want to smack myself in the head...
what the hell was i thinking???????
~W~

I have been suicidal over a partners infidelity. I did come close to doing it... had a bath ready, bottle of rum and sleeping pills and a knife, all sitting there waiting to go... I was so terribly hurt by the betrayal and then to have it turned around onto me, to make me think it was all my fault... so yes I allowed my self to believe it. I was holding off for a bit just playing with the water when surprisingly enough a friend happened to ring, she said she felt off and was wondering if I was ok.... after the chat with her my suicidal thoughts turned to revenge and murder... but they were just fantasies.

I think thats really sad and awfull

were these people worth killing yourselves for ?

i think if someone dont give their share in the relationship they are not worth caring about

there's the remedy

I think if you watch the video I created at the top of the post, you will perhaps further get insight into the mind of someone who walks down that dark path. The blood relative of mine I spoke of many posts up, who committed suicide via swallowing alot of pills was a beautiful person inside and out. She mainly committed suicide because her husband was leaving her for someone else and she knew it as he told her he was. Another reason we believe she may have taken her life, was she had recently badly injured her hand, and she was a tattoo artist and that was her livelihood, and that was the hand she used to tattoo with that was badly injured. . So the combination of losing her husband and her livelihood finally broke her. It take more than that for some poeple to go where she went but she some can only take so much. She was only human, afterall.

I do wanna, say having seen it happen to a relative of mine, I do not think suicide is the answer. For some it seems the easy way out, but to me it's solving a problem, with another problem. It's a sensitive subject and I appreciate all you respond to this thread. The insight & perspective of others is always far more interesting, then ones own.

I have a few times for a few different things to be honest with you. The latest was last year i was living away from home in another country and was finding it very hard to deal with the fact that 3 close friends had died while i was away. At First I went off the rails a bit by drinkin loads and then when i ran out of money and my friends wouldnt give me any i started mixing drinks with medication anything i could get my hands on, it all got to much for me as my live in bloyfriend wasnt helping me in any way i ended up cuttin myself on my arms and neck. No one really helped me untill i met a guy on the internet and we talked, he didnt no what i had done or anything about it but just talking to him made me feel alot better, he was from ma home town and when i moved home a few months later w met up and are now living together. He no's about it now but i dont ever have the urge to do it again. I like to think of him as ma angel he was there when i needed him and i thank him every day for that cause if it wasnt for him i dont no what would have happend. Xx+xX

Suicide is the most vicous thing a person can do to another person. For someone to kill themselves and leave a note or other missive claiming to have done it for the sake of love is disgusting. If someone loves you they do not kill themselves and leave you - that is not the act of someone loving you. And to do that to another person is despicable in the extreme.

The person committing suicide is gone and their part is over with, but the residual ripples of that act continue for years to come. The guilt the person left behind feels can be a crippling thing and is destructive.

To anyone comtemplating suicide because of love I say this - Don't do it. There are better ways to punish the other person. Grow some balls and deal with the situation. If you love the other person at all you do NOT destroy them like that.

Yes I was or I thought very much in-love with a married man myself (he was seperated) yet one day there was a big fight and he said he was going back to her, well I did alcohol and pills.. I coded and was in ICU for 2 weeks on a breathing machine till I came out of it.. I will not ever do that to myself or my child ever again.

As it says Suicide is a permnament solution to a temporary problem...

Plus who wants to be with a person that does not want to be with you..

Suicide is cowardly and pointless regardless of the apparent reasons. It is a simplistic escapism that serves only to end ones own problems or issues with blatant disregard for those connected with that person.

Suicide in the name of love, or because of love, is every bit as pathetic as the woman (or man,) that allows their partner to beat on them... because they love them...

Anyone thinking about suicide, regardless of context, needs to take a good look at the harsh realities... life can be difficult, it can be hard and it can be painful... it can seem like everyone is against you, or that you are alone but there are hundreds, thousands of people that feel in some way overwhelmed... and only the ones that try, that resolve to deal with the crap dealt them and make something of their lives... the ones that manage to feel some happiness, some joy or passion... that are respected...

Nobody ever thinks fondly, or respects anyone whose answer to a problem is to kill themselves.

i had thought about it. but not for love. It was a decision to stop all the pain and hardship. then realized that i would be leaving my children behind and id rather live and feel the pain and look at my children. Only reason i didnt do it.

No offense.

It's SOOOO easy to say that someone is being selfish, or irrational when thinking about suicide or going through with it if you have never been through what the person's been through. If you have never felt the overwhelming physical pain it brings that has nothing to do with over-reacting emotions.


Yes, it can be painful for those left behind, it can sound psycho, or selfish. And yes suicide is totally wrong and NEVER the answer.

I'm pretty sure if these people came back they'd never do it again, unless they are just THAT miserable.

But "don't judge a man until you walk a mile in his shoes", and "a heart that may seem to be breed malcontent may just be in anguish."

Well. I never attempted but strongly thought about it. I was wiith this guy for 4 years and he cheated on me meny times and has kids with another woman. He still tries to come around. Sometimes I feel as if my heart will never be healed. But I'm trying to move on. Love can really take a toll on your heart and body. :(

I respect all, those who have never attempted suicide but thought of it. Those who have attempted it and having had someone in my own family take their own life, I naturally respect those who have actually taken their own life. It's your body, your life and you own it. You have the right to do with it what you will and if ending your life if your choice then it is your right to do so. I don't recommend it by any means but never do I judge someone else, not knowing their pain, struggles and issues, who would do such an act. That's their decision to make, if they make it.

You respect people for killing themselves?

I certainly don't... most of these people could have gone on and made something of their lives... yeah it would be difficult and painful but opportunities and possibilities are endless for those with the courage to commit themselves.

There was someone in particular on here she will remain nameless, as it is private. I met her on here, and went out to see her which was like 13kmiles away from me. We fell pretty hard for each other, and she was in a situation regarding her citizen status in the Country she was in. I was going to move out there, and had put in my 30 day notice, and papers for a VISA out there. I came home that last trip out there, and she broke it off with her dude. Then said to get out there ASAP. I had my whole aparment sold furniture, and everything I basically had. Had the ticket, and she broke up with me after begging me to come out there. She said she liked being single, and said she loved me, but not enough to be in a relationship with me. I was her first female relationship, and she must have realized she was not gay, but almost made me give up everything I had in my life to be with her. That was that bonnie and clyde love. I would have become a criminal out where she was eventually probably like she was at one point just to survive I think. I was so extremely hurt thought I was gonna lose it cos I sold a lot of stuff. Luckily I was able to get it back. I did attempt to commit suicide, but instead started to cut again after 10 years of not doing it. I lost it, and before I knew it I had hurt myself even more. The most stupid, and childish actions I made were just that, lame! It's never worth losing yourself, or trying to kill someone you love because you did not get your way. I look back on it now, and really say what the fuck was I thinking. No one is worth that much .. no matter how much I love.. I will never lose it that way ever. The scars I have remind me to be the better person, and move along. Writing in my journal is best for me. I feel I can let it out in a healthy manner. Best coping skill VR has to offer us EMO's!

My Cousin back in 04 on Christmas shot himself in my Aunts kitchen, because he got his 17 year old girlfriend pregnant, and she was being sent away to Mexico to her grandmother by her father for he did not want them to be together.

That's sad. He still could have fought for his parental rights.

Although I think heartbreak and mental break is most poisoning to the living... I think people get too caught in the "emotion" rather than "reason". I know I wanted too, when I was stupid and thought love is all, mind you, it is great... but no, not all.

I just can't understand why people do it, I mean go all the way, and for what? He or she's not coming back to you, you're fucking dead now... we {as people} need to face our pain, learn from it, understand it... hell even question it... but, live. You'll be a far more better person from it... a bit changed in ways... but you will be better; as long as you ALLOW YOURSELF THE TIME TO HEAL!

Only then, you'll learn and understand that NO FUCKING ONE is worth... your life... hell, were they really worth your heart? So why your... life?

One more thing... "love is NOT suicide"... it is not the end.

Love is beautiful, so are the people that have committed suicide, for they have truly opened their hearts and allow the love to known. Many people just want to fuck and whatnot... but dare not love. They are afraid... and are committing suicide... on a deeper level, now those people, I do pity.

Love is beautiful, embrace it...
on that same note, never give your love without limit...
you have got to put a limit on it, for YOUR sanity.

I never really considered killing myself. I did, however, try to shoot my ex-lover in the ass as he ran from the house. His luck was that I WAS a horrible shot and that I had drank most of a bottle of rum before he told me he was going back to his ex-wife.
Now I wish that I had taken those damn shooting lessons about 4 months earlier. *smiles*
I didn't want to kill him. Just shoot him. I don't think there is a difference in the laws eyes but to me it is a big difference. I filed for divorce instead of trying more than twice to hit him. Haven't seen him since. *grin*
The end of love is hard. But can be overcome. It usually takes awhile but that is what family and friend are for.

In reading each entry in this forum, I am mostly horrified by many of the statements here... the insanity and the irresponsibility inherent to each is heart-wrenching as well as all entirely avoidable had they simply learned Life's simplest lessons... and then applied them in their own lives. Where to start!

Love and Hate are not at all close to one another but are at far opposite ends of the emotional spectrum. To attempt to state that they are very close to one another is to have absolutely NO comprehension of what Love is, at all. If you claim to have ever truly loved another... and then later truly hated that person... then you never loved that person to begin with. And if you disagree... then you truly do not know what Love actually is.

Infatuation, on the other hand, is suddenly and strongly felt.... just like hate... and is the "fools' gold" of Love that most cannot distinguish from the real thing... and often never do, broken relationship after broken relationship. Infatuation appears on the surface to be "love"... yet is the counterfeit to actual Love. Infatuation requires nothing more than a rush of feel-good hormones and endorphins not disimilar from that felt as children when we are attracted to little "Suzy" over there... and find out through that she feels the same way, too! As teenagers, this "matures" into finding out that "Susan" has the "hots" for you, too. However, at some point we should begin to realize that this is not love at all... but infatuation and lust.

First and foremost, Love requires knowledge: knowledge and appreciation for yourself, first, and then knowledge and appreciation of another. And knowledge of both yourself and another takes ... time and maturity and lots of both.

Instead, too often the only knowing most people care about is the all-too quick familiarity we acquire of each other's bodies and sexual preferences... while almost completely ignoring, much less ever really knowing, the real person inside. For immature men it's about ... sex... and pretending to know the person just enough to convince her to go to bed. And for immature women, it's all too often about appeasing their own insecurity by emotionally latching onto any man who professes "love" for them (so he can get what he wants... sex) despite the fact that she knows full well that the guy barely knows her at all. In both cases, they enter into what they call "love" and try to make it work... until things fizzle out and one or the other finds someone else in whom to be infatuated... and the next cycle of insanity begins.

This is not Love, at all. This is little else than selfishness, lust, vanity, and insecurity thrown in together with an abysmal lack of self-knowledge and self-esteem.

Over two decades ago the one woman I felt was truly the Love of my life suddenly broke off our engagement and left me. I still think of her often... even after all these years. It tore me apart when she left me and I have never fully gotten over it. Yet, because I truly did love her, I never once thought of harming her in any way and I, of course, never did; I let her go and live her life as she desired. I was grief-stricken and sad beyond words. But I still loved her and never once wished her harm. However, years earlier when I was 14 and first fell into what I thought was "love," and she later broke up with me, I was filled with resentment and anger and even hatred, though I never thought to actually do harm to her. The difference was, in my earlier years I was too selfish and too self-absorbed to understand what actual Love was. Instead, I had been infatuated with the girl. However, as I grew and matured, I discovered the enormous difference between infatuation and actual Love.

Today, I've been married now to the same woman (*gasp*) for over 25 years and I love her more than I could have ever imagined loving another Human being... because I love who she truly is, and she truly loves me for who I truly am. Oh... and as for the woman I had once thought to be the "love of my life"? She's been married and divorced at least twice that I know of and, to my knowledge, is now shacked up with future ex-husband #3.

Unlike Love, infatuation is about instant attraction, instant hormones, instant gratification to the ego as well as the body, and quickly becomes about wanting to own/control another person. Infatuation is easily felt, easily obsessed about, and just as easily discarded by one that causes the other to become easily offended and easily ego-bruised... and this often does indeed lead to hurt pride and hatred and... violent thoughts if the person is that insecure, irresponsible and immature.

As Doru stated, Love is not about controlling another person or them controlling you. That is very true... and is only one of the most obvious facts about Love.

True Love is about developing bit by bit the trust in one another that only comes through true companionship in life through thick and thin. However, unfortunately in today's consumerist society where everything is too easily acquired, used, and discarded, we too often end up treating others as objects to be treated as little more than chattel to likewise be used and discarded when we tire of it/them. This, also, is all about pride, vanity, immaturity, and selfishness... and is the antithesis of actual Love.

Anyone who truly seeks to do another harm most certainly does not love that person... and that includes suicide. Thus, anyone prone to such feelings of destruction is most certainly not ready to develop an actual loving relationship with anyone as such a person has not the slightest clue what LOVE actually is.

Love starts with yourself. And, no, I'm not talking about gratification. I'm talking about self-esteem and self-appreciation... both of which come from only one course of action: doing what is right no matter how difficult it may be or how many friends you might lose for choosing good over bad, freedom over addiction, spirituality over self-gratification, etc. Love requires all of this... and more... to be truly ready to seek out another whose values are also equally advanced. Otherwise, you will simply be clinging to another person who is as self-absorbed, as vain, as prideful, and as lacking in values and self-esteem as yourself.

When you understand the simple rules of Life and Love... you learn what works and what doesn't, and you discover what's real and what isn't. However, if you ignore those simple common-sense rules and instead let yourself be governed by your hormones, insecurities and selfish pride, a lifetime of hurt and pain and despair will indeed await you.

Thus, until or unless you can learn to love yourself, you can never learn to love another. And until you know what it is to truly KNOW and then LOVE another person, you cannot know what it is to truly never wish to harm that other person regardless how the relationship my ultimately end.


- Upir'

Even tho' I had done it *once* Iwould not do it again it is a cowardly way out of misery that could possibly be resolved in other ways. I am a much stronger person from the experience of the attempt and believe me it is not any fun to do it. I hope all stop and think before doing something that could end up a permanent dismise.

Death is not an answer just a way out of not dealing with life or the problems at hand. I do not judge anyone who has attempted it or has succeeded in doing it yet, I have to wonder if they actually tried every revenue of fixing the problem or changing things for the better.

I agree with Upir.

"If our love is only a 'will' to possess, then it was never truly love at all." - unknown

Oh my goodness... I'm sorry, a nerve was stricken.
...or possibly just and a thought...

Let me start off by saying, just because one has
"attempted" or have "succeeded" DOSE NOT
MEAN that they DO NOT know what love is, people
in general cross reference what emotion goes to
what word. Now that being said, I did not attempt
to end it all, it was just a mere thought for me.
I don't know if you would put me in that same boat.

For I "did" love my husband... when he "was" mine,
but, he's cheated soo many times; and when people
who do know what love actually is, it would screw
up anybodies mental state. Mostly with the "question"
of "why did/does the person that I love so much...
"how could he/she hurt me so bad, so much and why?".
That does not mean that one has "self esteem issues"
or whatnot, but more of "confusion" of the situation.

Now, according to "GODS" standards of "love", I
loved my husband... the way I was suppose to, as
his wife... he, on the other hand did not. Thus, the
reasoning of ones actions in getting out the
relationship/marriage are done in the wrong way, it
leaves a feeling far more worse than being slapped
in the face by the one you love... by the one who
hurt you. People deal with things in their own way,
though suicide isn't one to be recommended, for
it truly solves nothing... you can not say that they
do not know love, for every action, their is a reaction.
For some... well, they just didn't allow themselves
time... time to think things through, time to question,
time to understand, time... to heal and come to the
realization that the one they thought was the one,
well... isn't the one for them.

Plus, do not ignore the fact that most of the "leavers"
do not give closure, like my husband didn't; leaves
a big hole for us to fall in, and most of us do fall in. It
is harder to let go and move forward... it comes
back to the whole needing to understand and allow
yourself to truly UNDERSTAND and let go.

The reason for my mere thought of it, was because
I didn't understand why he did what he did... but
it did make me angry... and anger turns my pain
into strength... and strength into letting go. Which
brings it back to... giving yourself time, time to
question, time to reason... time to heal and
time to move on.

Again, I think suicide is anyone who is an adult's choice. Not saying I agree with it. Especially to do it over a lover who has wronged you. But, having a blood relative who ended their own life over a a husband who was leaving her, I have to say I did not lose any respect for her. That said, I also knew all of the reasons why she did what she did (I did not mention all of the details behind it in this thread). She has her reasons, not saying it meant she should have ended her own life, just that I understand it more so than some might. To end one's life, is that persons right as an adult. You own your body and can do with it what you will. There is no law saying you have to live out your entire life suffering as you maybe and are stuck, we all have the option. To choose that option is another story. I don't recommend it to be clear, all I am saying is I do believe it is a choice we all have equal right to make.

No I never have and the only suicide I would contemplate would be if I had an illness that would slowly destroy the brain! I wouldn't want to live like a cabbage....

To respond to Upir, I think that you can love someone and then hate them...it depends on the context of the relationship and what has happened in it.

I loved a girl/woman for many years only to have her not love me in the same way and abuse the trust and respect that I had given her! When I found this out I hated her for what she did and how she made me feel! That doesn't mean that I didn't love her to start with!

I just want to say, Upir is exactly right in everything he stated. And it takes YEARS to learn.

Well done, Upir. *pats on the back*

yeah thought about committing suicide

i wouldnt even think about it. if they leave- leave. who is to say they wont return? i wouldn't give anyone that much power over me. i am not gonna off myself because they want to jump ship. nope. not gonna happen. ever.

But in some situations that's easier said than done.

I've heard people say, "if I was ever with a man and he hit me, I would leave him/hit him back"

but when they get in that situation, and they truly love the person, it's hard to turn away, no matter what the offender does

Well, is sad what some humans do to themselves in the name of Love. Never cross their mind that after death, the cause of this act will be looking for someone else and start the game again. I have seen many people come to the ER, trying to get back to life. Trust me, after you do it, then something psychologically happen in their brain, is like a wake up, sometimes, we can bring them back, others, are not so lucky. If at any time, you feel like hurting yourself, just call the suicide hot line. They are professional who are trained to help you.

I agree with you.

There's also the teen hotline, even for PETTY middle school and high school drama before things get that far.

I have been catching myself contemplating suicide for quite a little while now.

I have been slowly losing a grip on this reality, and I am not sure how much longer it will be before I am pushed over the edge.

This is due to a dwindling love.

I shall not go into detail here.

Only as a teen: Probably at least 50-75% biochemical, and the rest family betrayals and lack of control over my life which led to a starved vision of the future.

Going through that period both scarred and strengthened me.