Cemetaries are very interesting places. I have been told for as long as I can remember that if you step on a grave you are desicrating it. Is this true?
There are many different sayings regarding cemeteries. Some say it's disrespectful, some say its a desecration. I am sure it depends on your individual beliefs regarding the matter. If you aren't sure..
Mayhap you should walk around the grave and not over it..
no it is not true. although the person who's grave you are stepping on knows you are there, there is nothing they can do about it. but now you are not descarting it. please get that thought out of your head.
I would say yes especially if you step on the head of the buried soul......
as for the feet well we all step on peoples feet unwittingly in life or death.
I do make it a point to be careful on where I step out of respect. It's a little diffucult to do so though during a funeral, but I still try to stay off them as much as possible.
I usually say I'm sorry to the person's grave as I'm walking over. i respect the dead. :)
Although I hardly believe this, a persons soul is not ment to remain or visit a cemetery. At least, it is not supposed to. This is why the ground is consecrated. That isn't to say spirits do not inhabit this burial gound, but the chance of them being the soul of resident is highly unlikely. If you step on a grave, you are just stepping on dirt that happens to have a box beneath it.
I also make it a point ot be careful especially if it is someone I know. I go around. i just get the feeling that when I do step on the grave, i am stepping on the person.....
cemetaries are history. you can find out quite a lot about a locales history by visiting a cemetary.
As far as stepping on a grave. Who would want to? I would say it is disrespectful at the very least
I don't feel it is a desecration as long as you have no malicious intent. If you are just walking through minding your own business there is nothing wrong, but if you are doing it with an intent of disrespect or hate then it can be a problem. Once a person is dead they are no longer in need of the buried body, and it just decays, so why would the soul care anymore unless you are using it symbolically to disrespect them?
There are variations from place to place... for example in certain cultures, as in Mexico, the day of the dead, the deceased ones relatives even sit over the graves, have there lunch and drink and take with them music... and no one on there sees that as profanity even being a very religious country
I don't think it's necesarly bad when you are walking through a cemetary...when you visit a loved one there, you usually stand right by the tombstone or over it, and sometimes find yourself talking to it. When its an overpopulated cemetary, it's kinda hard not to step where a persons final resting place is. They are dead, and that's all there is to it. I believe in some type of afterlife, so I highly doubt the soul would stay there. If you think that's disturbing, I was watching something the other night on most evil serial killers, and one man would go to graves, and dig up the persons body and use certain parts of them to actually decorate his home. He was diagnosed with a severe mental problem though.
i always find myself trying to avoid stepping on graves, i do it our of respect...
but if i accidentally do, i dont know worry about it.
I enjoy visiting cemetaries quite regularly for the peacefulness and quiet, and I try to avoid actually walking on or over the graves if I can. I just don't feel right about it.
As silly as it may sound, if I do have to walk on/over a grave, I speak softly to the souls that I mean no disrespect. It just makes me feel better.
I don't believe you are desecrating it by just walking over a grave. Like others have said the soul of the person is not there just the body. Most of the time when a person visits a cemetery it of respect for the dead to visit a loved one's grave or to learn about the people who are buried there. To actually desecrate a grave is it to do actual damage to the grave stone or to dig up the body for evil intent. Now some believe that even digging up the body for any purpose is desecrating the grave even when investigating a crime of how the person was kill, a crime that the person may have been involved in or even to identify the person with DNA years later after the person died.
I agree, maybe isn´t so many nice, isn´t a fault... but if i can i don't walk over that...
I DON'T KNOW,BUT I COULDN'T BECAUSE MY 2 SONS R BURIED IN ONE,& I WOULDN'T FEEL RIGHT ABOUT IT.THEY'RE MY BABIES,& I'D WANT THEIR SITES 2 BE PERFECT.
I feel it is disrespectful if you deliberately do so, but by accident or on an unmarked grave in an older cementary does not trouble me. I too have gone to gravesite of family members and sat down by them to talk to them. I don't believe they're still there but I feel closer to them there.
I usually try to avoid graves (stepping on them I mean) out of respect, but I always say a little apology to anyone that I did unwillingly or unknowingly before I leave the cemetary.
no sure but u might upset there familys if there about lol
~ i guess as long as you are not dancing on it, well its fine...they arent gunna jump out of the grave and hit you with a bone are they!
I do not think it is disrectful, and I am sorry if offend anyone but I don't bother if I step on it or not unless its a really old one cuase i know the ground can go down a little, and I was barried I would not mind if one was to walk over mine, but I will be incinerate so, anyway I would not do this if their is poeple around cause to not offend them but if I walk on one and I am alone I just keep on walking and don't worry about it.
I don't do it on perpous but I don't go lenght to avoid it.
Again sorry if I offend any of you.
I try not to step on graves, but cemetaries are sooo crowded its not easy. I think its more outa respect than a desicration thing.
Its also difficult in old churchyards in england. They move the headstones to the edges to make like afence and have the ground as like a garden of rest, the graves are still underneath
i try to avoid stepping on a grave if possible - but out of respect, not for fear of desecrating. England is a very small country, and very olde it's almost impossible to go anywhere without stepping over the ground where someone was once buried. you will find that paths change in churchyards that are very old, so wherever you walk you will be unwittingly walking on someones grave.
I believe that whether or not you are desicrating a grave when you step onto depends on tha attitude in which you are doing so. I frequent cemetaries to take pictures and simply to feel the energy there. In most graveyards, especially those of an older persuasion, it is difficult to not walk over the graves themselves due to overcrowding and bad grounds keeping. I am in a respectful frame of mind when I enter a cemetary however and I believe that if this is the case then you are not desicrating a grave simply by stepping on it. I do agree with those who have said it is a person feeling. If it makes you uncomrtable done' then don't do it.
~Fie
I don't have any problems walking around in a cemetery no matter where I step. I carry within me the utmost respect for those that are there sad feelings for those they left behind. I often go to my parents site. To call them out and speak to them by knocking 3 times on their stone first and bringing them gifts then thanking them when I am done and knock again to finish.
BLESSED BE
I try my best not to walk directly over the grave, out of respect. It happens occasionally anyway.
i always avoid walking on others graves. i just feel its mean to do that to them
i dont think that would happen but it i so disrespectful to the person and there family
I do try to avoid stepping on anyones grave but if it happens I am sure to stop and give my apologies.
It is almost impossible not to step on someones grave.If you go to a family members grave to place an object on their grave.You step to the left,you're on someone.You step to the right,you're on someone,You step behind.......Its the same.It's not disrespectful at all............Grow Up!
i dont feel its disrespectful at all..but then again i work at a cemetery. in most cases i have no other choice to do what i do it would mean my job. but i do love my work and the place that it takes place in
its like taking your hat off if a funeral procession or hearse goes past you - its a way of showing respect. it doesn't really mean anything - and it isnt really desecration or direspectful to unintentionally or mailisciously step on someones grave - its merely symbolic. a gravedigger will often dig up an old skeleton whilst making a new grave - he isnt desecrating the grave - nor is a mechanicam digger that is unearthing the church drains for maintenance. however - if some local yob or such digs up a body to steal a souvineer, or to be deliberately disrespectful - that is desecration. it s the intent that matters. there was a case a couple of years back when someone broke into a morgue and deliberately wrapped bacon rinds over the corpse of a recently deceased Muslim. the intent was to desecrate. it's intent that counts - not the action.
It all depends on the reason you step on that persons grave. If it's an accident then tha'ts fine. If you have a good intenet then it's perfectly acceptable.
Pleasent Nightmares, Rose (Blade)
i do agree with you karnstein
if the intent is good then its not dissrespectfull. but like you as well there are the occasional person that tries to rob graves. have had a couple of ppl do that at the cemetery that i work at. not only that have had some ppl come in and turn over 75-100 stones. that is total dissrespect.
its funny. i work at a cemtery and i dont know much about except for how to dig a hole and putting people in the ground. sorry i couldnt help
I love cemeteries go all the time and if i walk on the grounds especially the old ones i constantly say sorry, pardon me... don't know why just came out.. but i think it's respectful to do so
Thank you all for your input. It was a question that has been nagging at me for quite awhile. I do respect the dead, I do try to avoid stepping on them at all costs.
Thank you karnstein for your indepth explination. You answer all aspects of my question.
I keep away from cemetaries. I don't like to mess with spirits.
Use caution for respect should be ivin to the dead but not fear.
Hoo, buddy. I probably shouldn't post this, but my good friend Jack says it's a good idea.
As I gathered, the question was 'Is it disrespectful to step on a grave?' And the answer, basically, is "Yes, but if you're sorry then you're fine."
So how about this, then:
If you have done the deed in a cemetery, and was not sorry in the least at the time, is it okay later? Like now? When I think doing the deed about six feet above corpses is entirely too gross and disrespectful for comfort?
I'm going to hell, aren't I?
Dammit.
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birra Venerable Sire (131) Posts: 463 Honor: 0 [ Give / Take ] |
Doing the deed? Hmmm... I don't think that is so bad.
After all I'm sure the graves get walked on.. even driven on all the time..
...it's called, mowing.
Personally I think it's disrespectful the way we bury our dead. Emblamed and entombed in a sealed metal case... how are the nutrients of our decaying bodies supposed to return to the earth that supported our existance?
And where is the next super-race's crude oil supply going to come from?
Won't someone please think of the... (*insert your option for who/what will inherit the earth here).
lmao! Sick, dude! I'm going for fish people to take over next. Heh.
Strangely, that is a good point, though. Why aren't we giving the earth our bodies? It is entirely useless to put us in boxes. It is meant for respect for the person, but come on! What made the person who they are is gone.
I beleive that the grave is there to remind us where our loved ones once laid. by time the body will rot and crumble and the soul is the first to leave the body when a person die. as for stepping on a grave, it depends on the person per se and i don't think that it's disrespectful. in many countries, when a person dies, they will throw out a lavish party to help the soul depart to a better world.
Hey - Arunima, i have to ask. why did you do the deed over a grave? you see, if it was to deliberately be disrespectful - then it is - but if it was for a dare, or a vicarious thrill - it aint so bad. i mean - worms and critters shag in corpses dont they? life and death are two sides of the same coin. in some cultures, an act of procreation in a place of the dead is a sacred act - its a symbolic ballance. maybe it could encourage whoever lies there to be reincarnated in the ensuing offspring. i think there is a certain appropriateness about sex in a graveyard - but that's just my opinion.
I did that when I was a teenager, so doing it there was more convenience/thrill than anything else.
the grave is a place of remembrance, what lies there is no longer a threat or the person you once knew, it is only a empty shell. you need not fear the dead, its the living that will make your skin crawl.
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birra Venerable Sire (131) Posts: 463 Honor: 0 [ Give / Take ] |
Fish people? Hmmm.. a cross between super-inteligent dolphins and humans?
You know, Dolphins do like humping people in the water... it's not so far fetched.
And I agree with.. umm.. that last guy there. Life & death are 2-sides of the same coin. Death always brings rebirth.... that which is born is promised to die.
Trees in cemetaries are usually very happy and well fed.
Perhaps we should be grinding up our dear departed to use as fertilizer in the farm lands....
thats not a bad idea - as space becomes premium, cemetaries will become a luxury we can no longer afford - so we should mulch the bodies - use them to feed farm land, and create virtual cemeteries on internet sites
Thats a bit close to Soylent Green for me...
But Cremation obviously takes up less space. Or how about home storage kits?
Bury the family under the house....
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birra Venerable Sire (131) Posts: 463 Honor: 0 [ Give / Take ] |
Hey, great idea... why not, the internet will last forever, right?
Personally I want my image, as a young virant person, etched in diamond, placed into a sealed time capsule and locked away in a vault only to be open by the alien species that will someday invade and conquer our paltry little planet.
Then they'll look at my etching and say... "hmmm.. short, fat, bald.. odd choice for the leader of an entire race..."
Or something...
My body can go for fish food for all I care...
I do my best to not step on the graves but sometimes it can be rough when you go into a old cemetery or one that is not kepted well. I always state that I'm sorry when I'm near a headstone just incase i step on the grave by acident.
It is disrespectful walking over somebodies dead body if you ask me...I wouldn't like it...
The short answer is no. The long answer is that at the time of departure (the seperation of astral & mental bodies from the physical) the astral matrix (silvery cord) is severed and the astral & mental bodies are at once in the astral world (the Beyond), and are therefore no longer concerned (in most cases) with their physical bodies. In eaither case they are not there in the grave.
Thank you Highadder. It gives me a better understanding on some other things that I wonder about.
I don't know about the other stuff like internet cemetaries, doing the nasty on a grave or any of those things has to do with my question I asked.
I just want everyone to understand that I asked this question because of what I have heard and been told. I do make it a point out of respect of the families and individual who was placed there to try my hardest to not step on them.
I know that spaces are becoming quite tightly put together and I try to find paths to step either beside/between the graves or an alternative way to access the area I am trying to reach.
we have one of the largest cemeataries in the country here he have jefferson barracks here, i hears its a spooky place at nite
i think that when you step on a grave its not desicration its just disrespectful to the persons grave that you are stepping on.......but that is just what i believe.....i think its just better to walk around the graves and not on them
I believe it is disrespect...When I was younger [I was an angry, rebellious punk kid XD] I wandered around the cemetary purposely stepping on the graves, practically begging to be cursed...Alot of unfortunate things happened that year, but that might have just been fate, not because of the grave thing...But, I'm normally pretty careful of where I step in graveyards...If I must cross a grave I cross where the feet would be.
If you are doing it intentionally to disturb the dead then yes it is a bad thing, but if you are doing it to get to point a to point b then it really doesnt matter. I sit there and say excuse me mentally when I am in the graveyard for those that are already aggitated in the grave..
I have a deep love for them myself....i am very relaxed when in the presence of the spirits that dwell within.....most let me see them they do not fear me or i them.....i can cross souls to where they need to go so they know i have respect for the graves within
I don't believe causaly stepping on someones grave is either disrespectful or desicrating. Now, if you are messing with the grave ie. digging it up, stealing flowers, knocking over headstones, or dancing on it singing "ding dong the witch is dead", well thats a different story.
I think it is odd that people seam to have more respect for that which was once like them, than for the earth that they are converting into, it seams self centered. It is nessesary to respect the temple of the soul; but it is only that, a temple... the soul does not actually reside there. It is unlikely that the soul actually resides within the body at all, that the body is more likely a mirror that reflects the soul onto this plane. Theoretically every step and breath you take should be sacred; for what is it but the temples of all the souls that have gone before, let alone the inherent sacredness of earth.
-Kg
I must remember to add that to my "Done List"... you can always find fresh flowers in a cemetary for your buton hole... mind you, I have always said thank you and said a short prayer for the soul as I harvest one.
I think praying for a soul, living or dead, is a far stronger commodity than our silly superstitions.
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birra Venerable Sire (131) Posts: 463 Honor: 0 [ Give / Take ] |
I'm not sure how walking on graves is going to disturb the dead... isn't there generally 6 feet of dirt between you and them?
I can go in my basement 6 feet underground and not hear anything going on outside.. and it has windows.
"Casually" stepping on a grave when you KNOW it's a grave is still disrespectful...Not because their soul resides there blah blah, it's the moral of it.
well i really think they are the best places to sit and think or to talk an evening walk, but as for myself i don't step on graves. i think that it is disrespectful
Man, I told myself I was just gonna come on here, check the House forum, and leave. But no. I had to see if this thread went further, didn't I? I'm such a dolt.
Birra! Did you know that people are actually cremating themselves and condensing their ashes into diamonds? THAT'S what I want done with my body.
And thus, the corner pawn shop becomes a cemetery. Woohoo!
And some people have put the ashes into pills and eaten them... Sounds like a waste... I think we should bring back canibalism... however it goes against my religions views on burial... as does cremation and the following:
The ovens of New Orleans sound fun. Sort of an accelerated decomposition that doesn't involve burning the bodies.
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birra Venerable Sire (131) Posts: 463 Honor: 0 [ Give / Take ] |
Wow, there is a crappy little jewlery store in my area that uses the tagline.. "..where a really great diamond doesn't cost an arm and a leg."
Cremated bodies turned into diamonds would put an completely new spin on that one.
So maybe I can do that... have my body cremated, then pressed into a diamond, then etched to look like me....
...hmmm.. interesting.
This is funny that this thread is here today. I am on vacation and I have been visiting and travelling many places...and were I am at the moment, there are literally cemetaries every 10 miles from each other...and they are nice old cemetaires, some tombstones I have taken photos of, so back to the very early 1800's. These tombs are so well bunched together and so many in the graveyard you literally can't see where you are walking...meaning if you are walking over the grave....or if the grave is on the other side of the stone, as the writing on most are all warn away....as I do not like to walk over a grave....but some you just can't help it.
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birra Venerable Sire (131) Posts: 463 Honor: 0 [ Give / Take ] |
Sounds like a cool place.
You know, the Earth has been here for a long time. Life has existed for eons. We probably walk on the final resting place of people and other animals every day and don't even know it...
...for me, I just don't worry about it too much.
I know my Brother is buried in one of the largest cemetries where I live. It is jefferson Barracks and I go there often to feel close to him yet I think if you accidently step on the site itself, then it is not wrong yet if you purposely step on it then I actually feel it is very disrespectful...
There are several graveyards that are mass burial sites... no markers at all.
Yellow hill in New Orleans was one of them. For those of you who do not know, yellow hill is where the Superdome is now.
If I recall correctly they removed the top 5 feet of earth and moved it to a different mass gravesite in/near New Orleans. I wonder if back in the days of yellow fever if they burried people 6 feet deep?
I literally live next door to a graveyard. Most of my family are buried there together also. & apparently the street I am on, is built on an old Victorian graveyard...Not sure if its true, not really bothered looking into it.
i shouldnt think so u have to walk on them to place flowers on loved ones grave , so i would say it was ok
OK here is the deal besides what I have already said.
The disrespect thing has to do with the living and not the dead. The living are the ones that will be disturbed by desecrating graves, not the dead.
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birra Venerable Sire (131) Posts: 463 Honor: 0 [ Give / Take ] |
I don't believe it to be desecrating to step on...but if you feel uncomfortable about it then step around and be careful. I think it is a matter of personal opinion and your on beliefs of respect of the dead.
Thank you Irishvampgirl. I too, believe it is how you think and feel about it.
By Highadder's opinion then, it is perfectly fine to take flowers, once they are given to the dead, the flowers no longer belong to them. Also anything done that they are not aware of, such as graverobbing and bodysnatching then replacing the soil, is perfectly fine as it would never affect them. I still believe that the body/bones for as long as they exist should be handled with the utmost respect and not violated in such a way as to ascellerate their destruction.
This brings us arround to archaelogy; at what point does it become okay to steal the funiary items, and desicrate the body?
By Highadders opinion, once those who have known the deceased, and perhaps their progeny, are dead, you may affect the bodies in a manner that offends the rituals that were used. And what of the beliefs of those who claim decent? Say: modern Egyptian Islamic burial practices vs Egyptian practice; or modern Christian Practices vs, Native North American practice; et al.
It's not disrepectful to walk on the graves, but it can be detrimental to your health. We have a cemetery near here where the graves are very, very old. Some of them are not marked. The only way that you would know if you are walking on a grave is that when you do, you sink into the ground. It's really very freaky. They say that a little girl haunts the place. I've never seen her, but know other people who have. It's one of the creepiest places I've ever been. It's always cold there even in the height of summer. And even in the daytime, you can hear the little girl crying when you go near her grave.
I personally love to explore cemeteries. I love looking at the old headstones the best. But even some of the 'newer' ones are pretty interesting.
I would say its not desecration unless you have bad intent.
I would say it's disrespectful because I believe that if you step on a person after death, you are stepping on what was once thier life and saying it doesn't matter. Each time I cross a cemetary I make a cross upon myself to say sorry for the disruption that I cause.
Kglitterous, yeah, that's what I read, too. Your reaction proves it. :)
We can have faith all we want and believe what we will, but when it comes right down to it, we have no concrete evidence of anything after death. If we did, nobody on this green earth would be an atheist, and everybody would believe the same thing.
That said, it is possible, even likely, that nothing happens after we die. There is nothing. Zip. Nada. No soul, no heavan or hell, no Summerlands, no reincarnation.
At its very core, then, the religious rituals we do now and mankind has performed in the past in regards to burying the dead, mean nothing. They serve no spiritual function whatsoever.
However, that is only at the core of it. Lack of spirituality aside, it does serve to make us feel better about the passing of loved ones, and to reflect on beliefs that one day, that person in the ground will see and recognize you again.
That is where the respect bit comes into it. Spun from faiths, a deeper connection to someone else's dead flesh is felt. A sense of responsibility follows. While the dead cannot take offense to the stealing of flowers, to urine-soaked dirt, or to a broken tombstone, the aggrieved, with each vandalism, must again and again conciously or unconciously face that underlying threat of ultimate oblivion, ultimate finality, and ultimate futility of mankind. To maintain the grave is to maintain the faith.
i dont think it is desecrating a grave, no...i walk cemetaries all the time..i think thats mostly an old wives tale...
yano when i die i think i want to be buried face down so i can tell people i cant stand to kiss my ass, lol. but anyways i think the spirit of the person, if it is lingering knows you are there and knows you dont mean any disrespect, and they are dead...they dont care...trust me..some people say i can feel the dead...and i can feel something but as to what i am not sure...but when i step into a grave yard i feel peace and lingering emotions of others.
I totally agree with Katrina. I mean if you stand on a grave that isn't mark & really don't mean it, no harm done...But if you know it's there & you know you're standing on it then thats different...If I saw someone standing on my grandads grave or taking his flowers I'd go apeshit at them. I used to sit on my grandads grave near the headstone & think, but thats different, hes family etc
I do not think Your desecrating the Grave just by meerely walking over it but i personally do have respect for the Passed and their Families and walk around it!This is a Place were Our Loved Ones have been placed and many come and care for the ground to keep Their memories alive! I think it is just respectful to not walk over it!
If you're purposly doing it, then I think so.
If it's unintentional I think you're ok...
hm i was told that to hold your breath while passing a cemetary or the spirits would enter your body. I dont remember who told me i was like 10
If one were to remove the concept of the soul from the rituals of burial, an act of desecration would then lessen the magical or even cathartic power of the ritual. So, as a direct result, those who are benefiting from the ritual are offended. Whether or not you intend to offend those benefiting the ritual, there are likely to be repercussions that affect you, either spiritually, magically, karmic, legally or illegally. If a person has sufficient power to avoid these repercussions... or if one thinks that there is some (spiritual/magical) law that they are obeying that supersedes a reaction of this nature... then there can be no wrong done in the perceived desecration.
What if the law that they are obeying is the law of atheism? To say that they are affected spiritually by the act of desecration is to say that the atheist is wrong in their belief. You can believe that they are spiritually negatively affected, but if they aren't affected, then they aren't affected.
I dunno, it's like do you just walk all over someones property? Cos thats kind of what it is...
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birra Venerable Sire (131) Posts: 463 Honor: 0 [ Give / Take ] |
Oh boy.. now we're into it.
Yes, Arunima, there are many different faiths in this world. I'm sure some don't give two hoots what happens to bodies after people die. They might have other concerns like, not freezing or starving to death themselves.
The whole "respecting the dead" thing is summed up by what you see here... a person's beliefs. Everyone has their own, some people share, but not everyone agrees.
Personally, I think the only thing that goes on after death is a whole lot of rot. It is the end of body, conciousness.. soul, if you want to put that x-factor into it... the end of everything for you.. and the only real way to have life after death is to pass you genentics along to future generations and more importantly, raise your kids to be decent, useful, productive members of society.
Step on a grave.. no big deal.
That doesn't mean you can knock over headstones or steal flowers... for whatever reason they were put there, they belong to someone else - paid for by someone else.
Not the dead person but someone living who wants the stone or flowers there for their own reasons. You're not disrespecting the dead... but you are committing a crime.
Stealing flowers isn't disrespecting the dead persons grave they are put upon? LOL. Anything you say darling.
The idea behind this is to be respectful. Do they know you are doing it? No, but how would you like to see someone “walking” all over grandmother? Not a pleasant idea in my mind, I find it actually in very poor taste. It shows a lack of care or concern for anyone one except yourself.
Arunima, it’s actually your bones that they use to make the diamonds. Basically for about $10,000-25,000 your family jewels can be your femur ;)
Thats the point I made earlier...If I saw someone intentionally walking on my grandads grave I'd throttle em :P