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I was going over my own friends list, and I had to remove a great many because of deleted profiles, etc. Then I took a look at the "Friends lists you are on" and I realized just how many of these people I have NEVER talked to, or at the very least, don't want to speak to. I am wondering how many other people have this problem, and it there should be an option to remove yourself form someone's list for whatever reason?

I dont have premium..but i get these ppl writing me with dumb questions and they hit on me and such then i see friends list number go up..so i can understand where ur coming from..and i would agree that we should b able to take ourselves off of friends lists

I agree there,you should have the option to remove yourself form someones list that add you without asking or just to have alot of friends on their list.

I have no problem being on people's lists that actually talk to me, but some of those people haven't been here for ages, and some of them only have me on there so they can irritate me one way or the other- and that seems a mite unfair to me.
If you can remove THEM from yours, why not yourselve from theirs?

another thing is that when sumone adds u..u should b able to have the choice at that time to reject them and or add them bac

If they have your name, it doesn't matter if they take you off there list or not.

I live in hope of being botherd lol
Regards Carvall

I am plagued with watching my 'You are on X Friends lists' daily. I can't imagine just putting someone on my friends list for no apparent reason. I guess others do not think the same way. Sometimes I can go forever without thinking about it, but sometimes I just start to wonder, who just added me?

I'm on 70 friend lists here and have a clue about maybe 20% of those people. It's not a big deal to me. LoL.

I am so in agreement with all of y'all! There are over 60 people on my friends list..and I have never spoke to most of them! It is kind of ridiculous.

I have 10 people on MY friends list who I know and message quite often

I have 109 people who have me on their friends list - its nice but as I lurk most of the time, I really don't know what they are expecting of me

I also have two people who are stalking me but, as I have stalking turned off, I wonder what they're getting out of it

I would love it if we could remove ourselves from peoples friend list. So many people add me without ever saying so much as hello.

I think that if it is modified to the point where we can take ourselves off of other people's friends lists, then it should be a premium member option.

Think about it. We are the accounts that can see whose friends lists we are on, so therefore, any kind of upgrade for it should be for premiums.

And as for my view, I don't mind them having me on their friends lists. I have 157 people who have me on their lists, I might have talked to maybe 50 of them, if I am lucky. But if they want me taking up space on their friends lists, so be it. No harm done to me. If I don't want them to message me, there is a block button for a reason.

:-)

I wish there was a "friends request" option, so we could accept or deny friends requests. It does stink not knowing whose friends list you are on.

Its also quite a pain when your on a friends list of someone who's been suspended indefinately from VR.

I agree that we should be able to remove ourselves from other people's friends lists, or that a "request friend" option would be ideal. I know that I'm on the list of several people that I've never spoken to before and it's quite irritating.

I agree RedQueen , one should have the option of removing themselves from those who are irritating.


I also have people on my list that have been there scince I first came here. I DO appreciate them and although we do not talk ALL the time , still I am glad they are there. We do say hi from time to time.

What bugs me most however is people who just add you without asking first , then with no warning they remove you . To me it is rude behavior. As I have said before use your head when adding friends , don't just do it because you know how to press a button!

*shrugs* my coven recomends that we add each of our memebers..but if we don't talk why? I mean I'll talk if I find you interesting enough.

It is true , I take friends lists seriously.

I alway ask before adding anyone

I don't see what it matters. It could be that they found your profile interesting and want to be able to check back easily. It could be that they added you and don't message because they're shy and hope you say hello first. For whatever reason they may have, it really doesn't affect you unless you click "Friends Lists you are on"

If it bothers you to that extent...why check? Self inflicted torture.

I dont mind .. all I ask is please let me know.. I'll talk to ya .. meeting new people can be interesting , could be dull .. never know unless ya let peeps know

I always ask, but I dont mind if poeple add me, its a free world...lol

Thats what I am saying whats it matter.. If you dont talk to them whats the big deal if they add you to there list .. Are they truely doing any harm..

I am on 66 friends lists and I only have ten friends. Most of the time people do not inform me that they have added me, I think that is really annoying. Most of the time they add me just because I have rated them. I think that premium members should have the option to remove them selves from certain people's friends list.

I don't know all the people in my list. It does not bother me, those that want to add, subtract, whatever is their will. If they bother you, turn them offBLINK

Many of the people that have me on their friends list I've never spoken to or I did once a long time ago. I usually only add people that I know I'll talk to or who have added me and told me that they were doing so.

I think it's a good idea even though I admit myself adding people and accidentally forgetting to notify them that I did. Usually when I rate, I try to remember I've added them to my friends list.

I am on 478 friends list and I would say maybe 50 of them have messaged me. I do not care if you add me but come on say hello at least.

it happens, just because they have you on their friends list does not mean you have to even acknowledge that they are alive, it does not hurt anything on your end, waste of their space but i agree if it is an option to remove yourself from someones friend list it should be a premium benefit. i dont even know more than half the people who have me on theirs. no biggie, block button is great! lol ;)

I dont care who add me, I respect their free will, I do add people I talk to or find their profile interesting and want to go back without searching, I think its a free world so it should be free to add, plus if the person bother me I can always block so I see no problem.

im on 48 friends list, and i have an idea of who maybe 15 of them are. and those are the ones i have added or have added and taken off, but the rest is like .. uhhh who added me? especially when i have on my profile to tell me so i can add you too. If someone doesnt talk to me for a while, i delete them.

Personally, this is just me, I don't really care who puts me on their friend list. If they decide they like me, and want to read my journal or keep up with my profile or whatever, I give them permission to do so. In fact, I give anyone who reads this forum post permission to put me on THEIR friends list. Go ahead. I dare you.

Personally, I don't care if you add me, just ASK first please?

And do me the decency of saying hi once in a while also?

That's my only bother with the whole, "you're on X number of friends lists" thing.

I agree I am on alot of people list and they dont talk but I think alot add people to get ratins up....what ever works right!

It would be great if we could accept or decline them adding us to their list.

I agree with the last post.... I would be nice to pick and choose who we allow to be on friends lists, etc. Unfortunetly there is nothing we can do at this point but deal with it....

I have deleted several people from my friends list because i never talk to them . But nothing I can do about being on there list.

I guess I have to agree with those here that think that someone adding me as a friend is their right to exercise their free will. I also agree that maybe they are shy or maybe they just liked my page. I dont mind either way. Its nice to hear from them sure but its not sweat on my end if they dont...many times I see the number went up and I check my last 10 and see if I can figure out who it is so I can stop by and thank them and add them as well.....

yeah i dont mind if someone adds me to there friends list, I just would like to be let know first and have the chance to talk to that person.

yepper. i am on many more friends lists than people that are on my friends list. its kinda weird. i wonder who thinks they are my friend? lol

I don't really care if they add me, I just want people to start telling me, but what I hate is when I talk to someone everyday and then they suddenly stop talking to me.

yeah I have to agree that the sudden silent treatment is MORE annoying that anything because you start to care and build a friendship of sorts and then POOF they are GONE

I don't care how many people put me on their friend's list...the more the merrier...:)

So many people add me without ever saying so much as hello. but it does not bother me that much and I do agree that people should have an option of removing themselves from a friends list, I mean everyone should have that option of whoms list they want to be on or who is on their list. Ya know Choice..... it is a wonderful thing LOL!

same here i don't care who put me on there but i just want them to message me and tell me so i can put them on mine

yeah...i dont mind all the adds...but all i ask is if you messege me so i can add you too

why even have a friends list whats the use... people has a im for friends.... i can give 2 turds who puts me in there list but whats the point..... besides i dont like my b/f in girls list

meh... people add you to there freinds list for loads of reasons, unlike myspace this is not a popularity contest, still, some people fail to realize that. it doesnt bother me that random people add me to there freinds list, i just dont talk to them.

I do belive that you should be able to remove yourself from a freinds list but that you should have to ask the person your removeing, if they don't respond it automatically removes them, if they do then they would have to agree or disagree but give a reson for it.

of the 200 and odd friends that i have i always try & speak to as many of them as i can but sometimes its abit hard as some dont come on for ages & some get deleted for inactive profiles...!! But i always like making new friends!!!! :o )

I'm not a premium member, i'm on 32 friends lists but i don't know who these 32 people are, let alone if i've talked to them. I dont have all these people on my list.
I think you should be able to see who has added you even if you're not a premium member.

I'm on 65 friends lists, but only speak to a select few of them.

I don't know why people add you to their friends list if they don't plan on ever speaking to you.

I see really no problem in it ..
The block but is there for a reason if someone is getting on your last nerve , and you don`t want to talk with them...

Same here, I don't care if ya add me I just wish if you do that you would talk to me lol

I don't care if someone adds me and then never talks to me again... Cause you know what I do... I go up to my "who's friends list are you on" and I click on the people who have me on their friends list and say "hi" at random!! It's fun!! and I have great conversations...

Sometimes there are only so many hours in a day and you have every intention to talk to people on your friends list and you just can't seem to get there. Maybe you just like thier avatar... I don't know... I guess it just doesn't bother me... It's not hurting anything..

I think some do it so they feel more popular. So it's all good!!

i am not to much of a talker... if im on your buddy list you can delete me if you want to. i am going to delete eeryone in mine cause i dont talk to no one is there a reason to add people to friends list if you do or dont talk to anyone

I have to say, I could care less who has me on their friends list. It isn't like this is real life and there's someone out there using my name and causing me to get arrested!

It's just someone who probably thinks, "Oh, I like his/her profile and I might work up the nerve to talk to them sometime so I'll add them!" Or they thought when they FIRST joined that if you rated them, they HAD to add you or that in order to message you, they had to add you...something along those lines.

Seriously though, why does it bother you so much? It's a number on the side of your screen!

I am pretty new here... in the grand scheme of things... I have no problem with someone adding me... its nice when they ask.... cause then you know... but why would you have a problem with someone finding you interesting enough to want to keep track of you so say hi every now and then!

it doesn't really make a difference if they know what your user name is, they could just find you again. If there were really a problem, then there should be a way to block someone from your profile, but that might be a little extreme.

I would agree there should be some way to remove one's self without messaging each and everyone. I am on 188 friend's list. There are probably 20 or so I chat with on a regular basis. I actually I have less than 20 on my friend's list

Being very new to VR….I had been wondering about the strange mathematics of friends here….I was beginning the think that the really good ones counted as more than one…: )

How would that work? What may be a good friend to one may end up being a hell terror to another...

It does not matter to me if I am added or not ...YET, If we are a Premium member I feel we should have that option to remove or not after all it is aPremium Membership and we have all these other options why not have that one also, IF it is possible. That way people who CHOOSE to remove people from their list they can. just my thoughts on it.

On the other hand there is nothing wrong with lot's of friends

I agree that you can never have too many friends. You can never have enough friends. I don't see the point of having them though if you know not who they are by them not informing you of the detail.

I equate it someone that has a pickup truck that knows you are moving and then after the fact tells you "you should have called me. You could have used my truck"...

As it been said I am sure .. many just may find your profile interesting and added you to make it easier to access your profile to check on updates

I dont care who adds me to their friends list, i mean if i dont want to talk to someone i will just not add them to mine and i will ignore them...

i agree, i have people add me to their friends list and then just hit on me continuosoly.

People don't need to add you to their friend's list to hit on you. And frankly, if it bothers you that much and you're not a premium member..then spend the 4.95 to use the lurking feature, remove biting and stalking...it's one of the perks of supporting the site..and has a tendency to improve your overall experience.

I agree with Sapphire.

I don't mind people adding me as a friend. I guess the recourse to stoppng someone from bothering you is to block them.

i have 73 people listed as my friends. i talk to 2 on a regular basis, and i guess 5 have even asked if it was ok to be on my friends list.

Iam uasually pretty talktive after yesturday Iam not for thoss of you that know me and have spoken to me know of the kindness I have with you all and for those of u that want to know whats going on read my journal the info is in there thats why Iam crying have been since yesturday.

i am on 136 peoples friends list and i have probably 32 on mine y this is i have no idea

:O

LOL Iam new here but I think its polite to ask first though I ask always before just out of common respect to the other person lol. But thats just me.

I have been added to peoples lists and have never even talked to them.
I don't mind but if you want to call me friend then lets at least try and be friends shall we?

I'm on over two hundred and thirty five peoples lists. And I only have nineteen on mine. It weirds me out a bit that all these people friend me, yet don't even take the time to talk to me. I don't even know three fourths of the people who have me on theirs. I gets a bit annoying. If I could, I'd remove myself form the majority of them.

I do not mind if someone adds me to their friends list for whatever reason. After all this is Vampire rave where stalking and biting are encouraged. If we want to know who is adding us then we can always become premium members and remove some of the mystery..

I also agree with Sapphire and Pepper

It really doesn't bother me for people to add me, but I would like them to talk to me. Isn't that what a freind's list is for? your FRIENDS? I try to message the person that has added me, and I only add somone after asking and initating conversation. If I know that someone is normally on lurk, I don't add them, as it really doesn't do much good. Nothing against them, it just doesn't make sense to have someone on your list that you never know is on. lol I actually did some cleaning out today too.

i agree i think that we should be able to take our selfs off of other ppls freinds list. besides u should ask before u just add somebody.

I don't really worry too much about who's friends list I am on. To be honest, I don't mind anyone who adds me unless they are one of those people that contact you asking stupid questions all the time. But, in cases such as that, the person can be blocked and then you don't have to worry about ever hearing from them again.

I don't care how many friends lists I am on. Add me all you want. But, I will not add someone to my list just for the sake of adding someone. I like to get to know my friends, that's what makes them friends.

I wish there was a way.

I haven't had to remove anyone from my friend list because of deleted profiles but when I look at friends lists that i am on half of them I dont know but I try to get to know them.

I definitely have that problem. I have 73 "friends" on my list and I see maybe the same 5 on a daily basis. It's annoying really. Dare I say this, but there should be a "frienship approval" request sent out when someone wants to be your friend - kinda like how it is on *gasp* MySpace

I have removed some from my friends list because I have written the to say hello and they do not reply. So I informed them they are coming off my list. I at least bite or say hello to the ones I have as much as I can.

i agree you should have the choice

Wow i didn't know so many people had a problem with this I my self am on 149 and don't know half of them at all but it makes me feel popular to even though I to wish that they would even say hi to me once in this life time...so seems we all feel about the same way about it...

What matters to me is MY friends list.. It is half of the amount in which I am ON, but I don't mind... It truly doesn't bother me. All i care is that the friends on MY list, are the ones I talk to and talk Back.
If I sweat the small stuff I'd be long dead by now.
I have some added that have never even said hello to me.. I am obviously just a statistic to them.

I have ONE word for that......
WHATEVER!

:)

Since I became a Premium Member and you can see who's lists you are on... I have been pleasently surprised actually!

good point made...i know i have a great deal of friends on my list and should talk to them but usually i am not one to make the first message..usually if someone wants totalk i am all up for conversation...that option of removing ones self from someones friends list could be handy if someone was being a pain or bothering you in some way...i have noticed that people do add eachother on here like its a myspace contest to see who can get the most friends...

I'm not bothered about who puts me on their list. I have those people on mine that i want to talk to and that's fine by me

i agree with everyone :)

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