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I posses the ability of empathy. sometimes its a gift & sometimes its a f***ing curse. If anybody else has this ability, please, what is your opinon about it, & explain why you think this.

It is only a curse if you cannot control when and how to be empathetic. If you cannot, pick your company wisely.

it runs in my family. i can't help but feel what others feel. & trying to learn to control it, but sometimes its the one controling me.

I agree Raven...I'm the only one in my family who actually has this gift. Sometimes I do thinks its a curse because I'm always letting my emotion take over, especially when it come to my friends and family. But other times it feels like a gift, because the more help I give the more I feel like I understand.

yeah. somedays r just harder to deal w/ then others bcause of all the emotions.

I think it's a gift more than anything. True, it can really take a toll on you every now and again....but even with that, I find that it helped me help the other person in the end. So I'd say it's worth it.

i have it and i think it is both it actually depends in the mood i am in

It's both.

Too those who embrace it it is a gift.

To those who reject it it is a curse.

I agree about it being both but you need to take care of yourself so it doesn't rule your life. Everyone around you isn't going to be content all of the time and this can feel like it's destroying you.

people that are in synce with emotions whether through non-paranormal or para normal means are prone to exploitation from parasititic people.Caution as to who you share with is urged at all times.

To me it's a gift yes some days are more difficult than others but that's just because you are sensitive to other I have learned to live with mine an I am glad I have this gift!

I think it would be kinda cool to be able to have that power :)

it can be either a gift or a curse depending on wether or not you know how to control your feelings.

For me empathy is a gift as it helps me to be able to read others and get in tune with them.

Empathic, sensitive people are highly susceptible to other people's energy and emotions.
It is easy to lose track of your own state of being and get swept away by those around you, good or bad.
Many empaths have different ways of “shielding” or “grounding” themselves in order to avoid being overcome or negatively affected by the energy and emotions of the people they are tuning into.

Some of these techniques you can use depending on what you believe or what feels right to you:
• Visualizing a curtain of energy surrounding and protecting you.
• Picturing or envisioning a white light of protection surrounding you.
• Invoking or asking your spirit guides or guardian angels or those of the person you are tuning into for protection.
• Simple meditation exercises such as breathing are good if you practice them and then use them in times of need.
• You can wear or carry crystals which have properties for shielding from negative energy. Quartz is particularly useful for grounding and shielding in empatic situations.
• You can visualize a wire or roots going to a point deep in the earth, so that excess or energy can be directed there.
• You can imagine that you are a being made of light, and that the excess or unwanted energy is a solid object that passes right through you.

Personally I use breathing along with picturing my feet sinking into the ground just like the roots of a tree.

to feel anothers pain i believe would be a curse ... as i have survived 4 types of cancer and would not wish that pain upon my worse enemy ...to be able to remove thier pain that is a differant story that would be a gift the mirical worker is a movie based on fact of a woman who did take on othes pain and it was mind blowingand you would have to be a saint to let your self be subjected to that torture

empathy is to me both. a blessing and a curse. for i get headaches with mine. and i do tend to root myself offen to help.

I think a lot of it depends on how strongly you posess this ability. It seems to me that it could only make you a better person for it and allow you to help others, that is a true gift.

It's like any other ability. One most be able to control it. I feel it is a gift. I am slightly an empath and I have learned to turned it on and off at will. Yuo must know yourself and be in tune with yourself very well to be able to control this gift.

It's a gift! People appreciate someone who can be empathetic and can understand them on a special level.
If you're worried about someone dragging you down, it's true that it can happen. Don't let other people's woes rub off on you, but do listen to them, be empathetic and supportive without drowning yourself in their problems.

At times, the individual suffers from a psychological disorder that invokes such empathic abilities. Mild depression may oft times come to a head when you are around other like minded individuals. Or when you are in the house for far too long, developing that cabin fever state of mind...Which in turn makes said individual travel into the communicable surroundings; being around positive thinking individuals seems to perk many up. Thus the empathic ability seems to me as having been stemed from the psychie itself.

Although, the true empath may get a certain stomach ache, or headache around negative feeling individuals. Thus the issue involving the specified "curse".

The gift would be the problem solving. The empath would be the listener and is always understanding of what others are going through. Because of this aspect, the empath would be the best individual to go to when wanting to get things off the mind.

Or if the individual is the empath, then wanting to go from a sour puss mood to a happy go lucky would be the "gift".

Everyone is empathetic..it is simply a part of being human.It is more a matter of degree, and how one lets it effect them that determines whether it is a curse or not.

I only have problems if someone touches me physically, especially if I do not know them. There is a rush of images and emotions that fills my head with all their feelings. Of course I know how to sheild the psy stuff, but I do not like to be hugged or shake hands. This causes some to feel I am not sociable. With my friends I can deal with it because I know what to expect. Strangers, or acquaintances I try to avoid contact as I really don't want to experience whatever they are feeling at the time.

as someone said in this topic so be it a pain if you cant control it. It is always they who love to take advantage for they own on cost of hurt for you in the end.

I find it a true gift...

I didn't know what it was when I was younger but once I did I thought it was a curse until I learned how to block what comes in. Sometimes when there are a lot of people who are feeling the same emotions it becomes difficult to block and some seeps in which is hard on me but I've learned also to release it once it is in.

It isnt a matter of blocking really,it is all in how you process and filter it.
When you block you become unemotional..see it all the time.And as I said,EVERYONE is empathetic.It is a "gift" /'curse"to all mankind,not just a few.

Empathy can be a curse. My empathetic nature had caused me to try to shut down emotionally and that was not good. A couple of years ago I just didn't want to feel anymore and it lead me to some pretty dark places.

Im not an empath. But I do know someone who is, and when she found out she went through a rough time of ajustment. I can see how she thought she was cursed. After time and being with friends or family that understood and could help her out she has accepted her gift. She says she wouldnt know what to do if she wasnt an empath.

I am an empath and I know that empathy can be a big help, I know when to stay out of things, but it can be horrible at times too. Especially when most of your friends and family are depressed. It sucks. And I can't help it but to feel their pain. It's also the reason I hate big crowds.

for me it's a curse, I can't go many places so i stay at home all the time. I can't even hold down a decent job. A friend took my to this old mission down in Arizona outside of Tucson. As soon as i stepped out of the car i knew it was a mistake. I went in and the pain and suffering almost suffacated me. It over whelmed me so bad i fell to my knees crying. I could actualy hear people wailling in misery. He had to carry me out because i couldn't walk. I never went any place like that again.

If it's either, it's more of a gift for me. I enjoy and appreciate being able to read others well enough to see the general purpose behind why some things might be the way they are. I find it helps a great deal when I know a person who is troubled in some way, or needs something.

Bravo Oceanne you hit the nail on the head and the empathy that I know seems to be more in line with what you think as opposed to much of what has been described. Then again It’s possible that I may be wired to a different moon than everyone else…. lmao

Personally I believe empathy is neither a gift nor a curse and that it’s innate and visible within us from when we are very small, even toddler’s exhibit empathy in relation to happiness and pain especially towards parents or care givers. Empathy is learned and modeled on the behavior we are exposed to and base on an acceptable moral code that is socially compliant.

To say that empathy is a gift inherited by a chosen few is nonsense because we all have the ability to empathize. Everyone has practiced in an empathetic manner at some point or other whether they realise it or not; grant it some more than others. Within my profession (social work), I practice empathy daily and I have been trained, observed and assessed in practice, to ensure I am fit to be let loose within the community and deal with the public. I (like everyone) have the ability to consciously choose when and how to be empathetic, because it’s a communication skill that can be instilled, taught and developed not a ‘Power’ attributed to those with a magical and mystical disposition …. Such B.S.

How can empathy be a curse when it is something that we can control when practiced right? If its sucking your will to live then don’t do it so often, say “No, I need to be mindful of my own mental health thank you very much :P ” people will understand. Also for those who are adamant that they have an absence or lack of ability to empathize then those individuals are predisposed to abusing and exploiting others and there is the possibility that they may have Narcissistic and Antisocial personality disorders.

It depend on the kind of people your around ----- I like being able to feel everything around me --- as some one said choose your friends wisely ...

It can be a curse at times, often feeling others thoughts or seeing past trageties or even future ones can be very overwhelming.

I'm the only one in my family that has it, but I'm also a Virgo and they are very emotional to begin with so I believe that its a curse.

I forgot to say I believe it is a gift because you are able to understand your friends alot better...you can feel their feelings...

better to understand then to not dont you agree?...

When I first read the question the old saying....a good workman never blames his tools came to mind.

Personally, I don't believe that anyone need be made misserable if they feel they are empathic.

If you believe you have it, then learn to use it.

Curse. Simple as that.

example: whilst living in London, an old woman was hit by a scooter while crossing the street in front of the Parliament. I ran across the street without thinking (and looking the wrong way) and was hit by a bicyclist as I reached the woman.

example #2: A guy I used to see on the train always wore a bright purple sweater with a kitten on it. it was torn and tight and quite evidently the former property of a child. I decided to give him two articles of clothing that were relative to his gender and would fit. Two weeks later, he attempted to hump my leg on a crowded train.

example #3: An old woman was trying to find a seat on a train. No one got up for her and all I could think of was how pissed I'd be if my grandmother were going through this. I gestured to her and got up to give her my seat. She thanked me and sat down. Two station stops later she told the woman sitting next to her "I think that ni--er girl that gave me her seat took my shopping bag".

And yes, I am still the first person to go run into the road for a stranger, offer my seat, the shirt off my back and I am both a bone marrow and organ donor. Empathy is for masochists. lol

Just to add on that -- in case it appears I don't know the difference of being an empath...

Part of the reason I became an insomniac was because I was unable to control all the emotions I was taking in from others. I could pass strangers on the street, make eye contact with someone, just witness a quick exchange of conversation and by tone of voice alone, I would sink into these dark gaps of emotion. In addition to lack of sleep, I also had loss of appetite and long bouts of total reclusiveness. It became too much for me to feel like Atlas holding up the burdens of the world.

There. Babbling done *wink*

CryingDutches can you please explain further how your examples exhibit empathy and not random acts of genuine kindness instead? Also, how can an individual show empathy for a person that walks past them on the street? I don’t understand how this can be.

To me, empathy is a core therapeutic “listening” skill that communicates to the individual that we understand their concerns and know how they are feeling at that moment in time. It means getting inside the world of the person that we are helping so that they feel accepted and understood. Empathy also has cognitive elements which involves the use of words to highlight and name feelings. This cognitive expression is anchored in a genuine understanding of the individual’s emotional state and it’s conveyed through facial expression and vitality affects that are picked up and responded to, through the observation and self-awareness of the individual who is showing empathy. It’s kinda mirroring the individual’s inner-person experience. I’m concerned that I have been taught wrong at college O.O

It's a gift that too many people online claim to have but really don't, in my opinion.

At first for me Empathy was a curse. I didn't know how to control it or control what was happening to me. I felt like a leaf on the wind drifting around on everyone's emotions and not knowing who i was any more. I ended up very depressive, anxious and started avoiding going out in public.

Then with the help of a friend and doing some research into my ability I learned to control the situation. To filter through the emotions I wanted to filter through... more positive ones. I learned to ground myself and rid myself of excess energies and through meditation found me again.

It took a very long time, but I am at a point now where I can use my empathy as a counselling tool, drawing out negative feelings bringing them to the surface and replacing negative energies with positive, helping to ground the energies of others and helping them to find themselves again.

So now Empathy is a tool lol. Hopefully with time you will be able to control the ability as well :)

a friend of mine is empathic, but he cant control it , so sometimes people is sad and he cant control that sadness... or otherwise, if im happy ... he´s easily beaming!!!
same thing if someone is sick... or mad...
ive tried to help him to control it but he hasnt succeeded

tis both i think.
there are feelings/emotions you dont want to know from people but yet you want too.

What is Empathy?
Here are 5 points about empaths that answer the question - Empathy - what is it?

1. Empathy is the ability to recognize, understand and read the emotion of another person. A simple way of describing this would be to say you put yourself in anothers' shoes. You are literally doing this and in turn it could be said that you are resonating with the other person. Some people can do this voluntarily and others do it accidentally. The process involves the ability to read in others, the energy and subtle differences in frequency associated with the range of human thought and emotion. Most people don't understand how this process works but when it comes to helping others it's enough to just recognise you have a gift and that you are sensitive to others.

2. Empaths often have telepathic ability which means that your ability to 'read' is enhanced. Some empaths have a deep sense of 'knowing' which further enhances their ability to read another person. This is very useful because people are complex and often display a persona over many layers of thought and emotion. The ability to see under the surface and sense someone's true feelings has many useful applications when it comes to helping others. I use this myself in the process of 'life coaching.'

3. As the word empathy suggests, empaths have the ability to act in empathy. This helps others because you can act with compassion and understanding enabling the other person to feel they are not isolated or alone in what they are experiencing.

4. If you could measure the strength of an empaths ability you would a wide range of difference in ability. This is because of the 'human' factor. We all have varying degrees of understanding,awareness,judgement,emotion,intelligence and compassion. However everyone has empathic ability to a certain extent. For a variety of reasons people ignore or are unawre of this ability.

5. Many empaths have an interest in people and become proficient with reading body language and listening for verbal cues that betray what someone really means during the process of communication. Whislt these skilss are not empathic they do enhance the empaths ability to help someone.

Personally I have found that many empaths have trouble seperating the emotions of others with the emotions that are generated in themselves when they read others. It's an easy mistake to make because emotions are intense and cloud your vision. They fall into this trap because they don't have the ability to work with emotion themselves.(see section 'Aymens articles')

Source: http://www.spiritual.com.au/articles/psychics_mediums/empathy-whatis.htm

To Mimi:

Empathy -- in my case, I can pass someone on the street and get a vibe off of them that draws me to them. Sometimes it's happiness and sometimes it is total misery. I corrected myself in the post after what can be misconstrued as just random acts of kindness. That, however, was to simplify my situation. For instance, the man on the train I would see was no different than many other people I had seen with less, but something about him made me feel an intense sense of, what I can only explain as pain and determination.

I have made eye contact with people for brief moments and felt completely overwhelmed with emotions irrelevant to my present state of being. I have met the gaze of others and felt nothing at all.

the only time I never question what I feel is when I am around animals. I have always had a gift with them -- they do not fear me and I seem to get an understanding of their emotional state.

So, to answer your question -- I react to my feelings. I don't always absorb it and tuck it away for later. I sometimes get a feeling about something and HAVe to act on it -- if it comes across as an act of kindness, then so be it. People tend to deal with their "gifts" differently. I would rather act than dwell. Dwelling makes me sick, literally. Sorry, if I was unclear.

Thank you CryingDutchess for your informative response :)

explaining to someone that someone they know is a fake or phony, by using information from "gleaning"(the ability to discern a persons intent from claims, by degrees of assessment, emotional projection being one).

Is where the "drain" comes from they will defend the person and likely accuse you of being prejudice, they eventually get jilted by the person. It really challenges the intuitive persons practice.

I am not an empath but, I would think it would be a gift, provided you can control the emotions associated with it. If not, I suppose it could be problematic but I doubt it could be considered a curse.

it could be both it depends on what the sitiuation is at front....

I am lucky I can only use my empathy power when I am trying too. I can see how feeling what others are feeling with out being able to control it could be very bad I had an ex who linked with me and didn't trust me started using the link to know how i was feeling and he was overwelmed with my emotions.

Then there are those that would project false emotions to dupe a suspected empath, to influence their reaction to something.

its called being an emotional woman with experience.

reminds me of when in hitchhikers guide to the galaxy and Beeblebrox was about to fire the point-of-view gun at Tril and she shrugged saying "it won't work on me... I'm already a woman."

Empathy is a gift. Learn to manage it and it will cease to be a curse!

to me its a curse, i feel for everything i feel bad for stuff i shouldnt in which others would rejoice in its pain...

I really believe that Empathy is both a gift and a curse to person who has it

It is a gift just learn to use it anything can be seen as bad

it definitely depends on the person and their level of control both emotionally and mentally
i know a very empathic person who struggles with depression. it helps her when she can be around positive people because she feeds off others so much. she is not able to turn it off or on at will. the problem comes in when she feels empathy for those who suffer from similar problems as her own and strives to help them. it usually ends up affecting her very negatively and she doesn't see it.

I believe it is both. I am a healthcare worker, Empathy is a must! However I too feel non-empathetic @ times. I have a hard time with people who shorten their life spans with alcohol and street drugs. Meth is a killer. It makes me sad for the weakness it brings out in humans.

My brother thinks it is a curse. He bears the weight of others on his shoulders. Personally he looks about 100. He worries more than need be because some problems can be easily resolved.

I have always thought it would be a gift but then again feeling the emotions of others could get a little tiresome after a while. I mean I guess it wouldn't be a problem if the people you were around were calm but if someone was angry or sad then it could prove to be a problem.

I'm an empath.... For me I have to draw a line between family, friends, co-workers, etc. I make it more complicated than it needs to be but it works for me... LOL ... anyway, I keep everyone at a distance unless you are a family member or a friend.. otherwise it's very over whelming... I have been looking into meditation as an outlet for the extra emotions I am burdened with sometimes... right now I just bottle them up... NOT GOOD.... LOL ... one of these days I'll be able to handel most situations that come my way... but building Walls is a good way to go for starters until you can get it under some sort of control! Although you're empathic doesn't mean you have to bend to everyone that comes to you...

it is always good too put distence between you and others if you are empathic...

My Empathic abilitys still shock me at times. But for me its not just emotion that I can read or feel but I can pick up on why somone is feeling what they are.
But I have also learned that the extra feeling can be used for energy. Hence why Mad people make me smile.

in truth it is both... it can help you better understand what others are feeling, even when they are trying to hide their pain (for example) from the world... then again, when i moved into this appartment building i had migrains for the first 2 or 3 weeks trying to adjust to all the diff emotions everyone in other appts were feeling! i had to force myself to pull within, and back it up enough to only let my powers reach the area inside of my appt... it was hard, and it hurt for a while, but it was good for me to learn anyway... so yeah, its both, and it really depends on perspective and your focus...

I think everyine can feel alittle empathic towards others...

Your very right TempressDookz everyone has the ability to empathetic, its innate within each of us, however levels of ability vary. Some individuals are more experienced, trained and develop their 'skills' in this area more so than others.

gift.
talents are always gifts, the use is a moral issue in the how.
you may have the talent to shot someone from a mile away with a sniper rifle, its still a gift, but you shouldnt use it.

I believe it is a gift, but it can be difficult to decipher which emotions are yours compared to those of others. Shielding yourself takes care of this fairly well.

What Slave Angel said reminded of what my brother would do, he would have walls as you say. If he was going somewhere like a wake or funeral, he would have to prepare himself

i dont have it but if i did i would think that it would depend on how i viewed it. if i saw it as a curse then it would be and vice versa

it depends on if u have control of it. it can be a curse if there is no understandin of what is going on

Seems it is a curse until you learn control, then it becomes a gift. It is something that must be practiced. The choice is there, master the gift or let the curse master you.

It really depends on how you utilize your ability, just like anything else.

Its not what you have, but how you use it.

If you can learn to control it,you are blessed with a gift

i want to know why so many people who have the gift ....are not willing to help others? this seems very selfish sure you feel the pain and that can feel like a curse but learn to channel the negative energy away towards to ground or sky i have seen people do it both ways mostly down to the ground thoe. and embrace the possatives.

M. Mime -

But what if said 'gift' causes more harm than good to the person who has it?